A Man and a Maid - part 2

Introduction

As we consider the business of dating, courting, a young man and a young lady finding each other and deciding to marry.

This falls into a category of things where the Bible doesn’t give us precise direction.

The easy thing to do then is to only be instructed by whatever the current mores are.

This is to say, we put only the most basic rules about general Christian behavior in place and then assume that whatever we do within those bounds is fine.

What’s worse, we delude ourselves into thinking that the current way (or maybe the way we did it 30 or 50 years ago is best. Certainly better than back in the bad old days of the beforetime.

But wisdom doesn’t come in the moment. Wisdom is always found by looking backwards and we are not a people who are culturally acclimated to looking backwards.

Here is one other issue, when we are talking about something that the Bible hasn’t strictly regulated, we too often think that mere guidance isn’t worth mentioning. Unless we can make a rule, best not say anything at all.

Just because a behavior isn’t sinful, doesn’t mean it is best. Just because it isn’t best, doesn’t mean it is sinful. But don’t we want to get a sense of what is best at least as a point of reference.

So in fear of making rules, we leave out even guidance. What a shame.

The Search

Who do you want to marry (Prov. 31:1, 10-31)?

This should not be a mere consultation of your current culture educated desires, but consider also what you SHOULD want.

Ladies should look for a man they can respect and follow.

Men should look for a lady than can cherish and who will be a trusted helper.

What about those with “another faith” (Gal. 1:6-9; 2 Cor. 6:14-18)?

What about preferences (Gen. 12:11, 14; 29:17; Deut. 21:10-13)?

Are you the kind of person that person would be interested in?

Rules of Engagement

Men should be the ones to pursue women (Gen. 28:1-2).

That does not mean ladies are passive (Ruth 3:1-5).

Restraint should characterize these relationships (Prov. 4:23)

Too often we think only in terms of putting up only physical guard rails.

Intimacy involves much more than the ultimate act (1 Cor 6:16).

Wise precautions prevent bad appearance and bad behavior (Jn. 3:19).

Conclusion

We can’t give last words on this because God hasn’t.

But we can be guided. We can certainly reduce the amount of heartache and regret that