Linda stone funeral

I’ve titled this message Lies, Dates, and Dashes.

You might have just whispered to yourself,

Why would anyone use the word lies in a message at a funeral? Is he okay? Yes, I’m fine, and that’s part of the reason we’re going to begin this message talking about a great lie in humanity: “I’m fine.”

Pray

Almighty God, there are many feelings that well up within our hearts today. We feel the sense of loss in Linda’s passing. We feel anger at the fact that we can’t visit or call one more time. Who can we turn in these times? Human courage and strength were demonstrated by Linda for many years, but in particular the past 2 years. Father, we turn to your healing hands, the calm of your peace, the comfort in our pain, and the hope of your Word revealed in your Son, Jesus Christ. In His name I pray, Amen.

Before I deliver this message, there are some people that need a special thank you on behalf of Dave and Linda and their family.

Karen Hines, I’ll start with you. Mom and dad have been friends with Dave and Linda forever. Karen has sat with Linda, she’s helped Dave with planning all of this, and she has provided an ear for Dave’s thoughts during this time.

Chris Quigley - thank you for your love, compassion, and care for Linda. Along with Andrea Petermeir, thank you for taking Linda to get her nails done, It is not the first time today we’ve heard a thank you for you, and this will not be the last either.

A deep and profound thank you to three incredible ladies at the Iowa River Hospice House.

Felicia, Olivia, and Joy. Where you are seated today, as part of Linda’s family, is on purpose. Dave called me and we spoke your great love for Linda. Olivia, who has said she’s always kept it together, was overwhelmed with tears on Linda’s passing. How you three cared for Linda with such compassion and kindness is incredible. Thank you for loving her with such dignity from beginning to end.

To Andrea Petermeir - who took Linda on what Dave called her “last hoo ra” on the Wednesday before her passing. She took Linda to Legends to eat, to get her nails done, and then to Riverside Cemetery to feed the ducks. You gave Linda the comfort of knowing she was loved and cared for like you were her family.

Pastor Jay read for us from Psalm 77:1-7. The author of that Psalm lays it all on the table.

God isn’t there. God doesn’t hear you. God isn’t available for you right now, or ever. God is vengeful, angry, and comforts no one. God doesn’t answer me. God has no control over anything. God just isn’t personal.

Lies. All of them. All of these statements are lies. But, if you listen to some people enough and long enough, you’ll hear them. I want to make sure that you hear the truth about who God is. The words of Psalm 77 reassure us of who God is and how we can come to Him in times of crisis or struggle.

The writer is overwhelmed by sorrow and his first action to cry out to God because he knows that God will hear him. He sought the Lord in his day of trouble. Everyone in this room can relate to this person’s struggle right now. The author says to God, “I’m strugglin’ here!”

Listen, we all say and do things when we are grieving or struggling and they don’t always make sense. God understands.

The writer goes on with his rant at God. It’s like he doesn’t even care if God is there, he just lets it out. God, you kept me from sleeping, you kept me from speaking, you made me meditate through music. In verse 7, he gets mad. Have you forgotten me forever? Am I your enemy or child? Are you unfaithful and a promise breaker? Have you forgotten to be gracious? Have you withheld compassion?

Have you spent time asking yourself, or God, these same questions? Let me tell you, if you have, you’re in great company. You see, God is able, more than able to handle your feelings or emotions, big or small. If you’re angry, He hears your anger. If you’re questioning why, He is big enough to handle the questions.

You’re grieving, God can provide you comfort. It may not be on the timetable or circumstances that you think it should, but God hears you and He is merciful.

The 103rd Psalm verse 8 says:

The Holman Christian Standard Bible (Psalm 103)

The LORD is compassionate and gracious,slow to anger and rich in faithful love.

Verses 13-14 say

The Holman Christian Standard Bible (Psalm 103)

As a father has compassion on his children,so the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him. 14 For He knows what we are made of,remembering that we are dust.

There is a God who is present, who is personal, and whose heart is full of compassion in your time of struggle. He can handle it all, bring it to Him, lay it down at His feet and be assured of His response.

The Psalmist started thinking about all the things God had already done in his life and his tune starts to change as you read on in verses 10-20. That is why the second part of my message is dates and dashes.

Dates are important. We all know this. Drive with an expired registration tag and you’ll find out. Seems that knowing when the full moon was coming was important for Dave and Linda. Full moons do seem to cause strange things to happen. Dave told me that one time Nicci knew something was up and called him, asking “is there a full moon?” See dates matter.

Some of you may know this, but Linda had NO IDEA what she was getting into on August 26, 1984 when she married Dave Stone.

Significant dates like children’s and grandchildren’s birthdays, when it was time to plant flowers, when it was time to water and care for the flowers, these things are part of Linda’s life based on dates.

About 8-9 years ago, Dave said, that was when they really kinda got it figured out. I know that New Year’s and the 4th of July were important dates for Dave and Linda and some of their closest friends.The yearly trips on those dates were important. Linda may have even remembered the date she got a fax from Dave....while she was in Hawaii... Even this one: Linda quit smoking so she could save up money for a trip to France.

There is of course the reality of the date when Linda needed to move into the care center, and then to the Hospice House.

As we have gathered here today to celebrate, there are coming dates that will be hard. On those dates where Linda was so prominent in everyone’s lives are those that challenge us the most. The Apostle Paul, in

2 Corinthians 1:3-7 tells us that our suffering, our pain, our grief, is not to be carried alone.

It is very apparent that the Apostle Paul writing in from a unique perspective: he says "we" and "our" a lot. Why? Paul knew that grief accompanies suffering and affliction, and it is not meant to be experienced alone. Paul identifies God's relationship to comfort for us in verse 3 – He is the God of all comfort.

Does that matter right now? Does God magically come down and instantly wipe away grief and suffering? No, not that the Bible teaches. Through the Bible, we learn about God, and the word comfort is used 109 times. The simplest definition of the word means to be called to one's side or to be called near; it means to console, encourage, and strengthen by consolation.

Beloved, Linda volunteered at the Iowa River Hospice House because she knew that others needed comfort in their afflictions. When it came time for Linda to be cared for in Hospice, she felt that same comfort that she offered to others. For all of us, in our times of suffering and affliction, there is a God of all comfort.

Linda was strong. She battled and battled and hung in there when others would have folded. We hear about God’s grace in songs, prayers, and experience. As I mentioned earlier, Wednesday, August 3rd is an important date. Andrea took Linda out for an outing. If you peer at the day from a distance, God’s grace, his favor that goes before us, opened up Linda’s strength one more time to experience life on this side of heaven.

As of today, we, in this room, are all one date people. We all have a birth date and that is all. Linda Stone has joined a community of people with two dates: birth and death.

Friends, we are here to celebrate the dash that exists between November 20, 1947 and August 5, 2022.

Could she have imagined the fullness of the dash that she would experience here on earth?

The trips, the beauty of the lake, the joy of children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

She packaged picture after picture of her family. I’ve seen them. She may have even predicted a couple lines from Dave: I know Linda, I’ll take care of it. Now, rumor has it, Dave was always busy. In fact, Dave told me there were times where they would have a little…conversation…and Dave would say, “Linda, when will I have time?”

And, ya know what, she’d do it all over again anyways. I’m not sure if Dave or the kids are great boat drivers, but Linda Stone stayed in the boat with him through it all. Maybe Linda was the driver, and if that’s the case, all of this make more sense.

You want a phrase for remembering Linda Stone -

Love as though you have never been hurt. Laugh as is you haven’t a care in the world.

What we know about those who fear the Lord and call on His Son for their salvation is this: when we leave this earth, we are wrapped in the eternal presence of His glory that surpasses all understanding and is without suffering, pain, or tears. Heaven is a place where she doesn’t have a care in the world because of who she’s with.

Dave told me that there were times when they would have a…moment…and Dave would say, “I know Linda, I’ll take care of it.”

For you, her family, in your moments, God responds. He may even say it, “I know Dave. I’ll take care of it.” I know kids, I’ll take care of it.”

The truth is we are all called to make a difference with the dash we are given. Linda Stone showed us all what it means to live a life of dignity. Not just for ourselves, but especially for bringing dignity to others through service, compassion, and love. I challenge everyone here to think about your dash and how others will remember it