The Other Side of Awkward

Awkward silence. Awkward moments. Ever had one of those? Maybe it was a date. Maybe it was meeting someone new and you just didn’t quite know what to say. Maybe you said something and everyone just sort of stared back at you with gaping eyes. Jesus had a lot of awkward moments. He ate with a bunch of sinners and made everyone else gasp. He did things he wasn’t supposed to on the Sabbath. He said weird stuff. He called people out on their sin. He told confusing stories and predicted his own death. Jesus wasn’t conventional. Jesus was awkward.

And those who followed him were awkward too. Think of some of the crazy stuff others did just to get to him. The friends who lowered their friend through the ceiling during the middle of his lesson? Awkward. The woman who pressed through the crowd and was so desperate she grabbed for the hem of his robe? Awkward.The other woman who came to the party for all the big wigs and started crying at Jesus’ feet and anointing it with the most expensive stuff she had? I can feel the awkward pauses. The exchange of looks that say, “is this really happening? You can’t make this stuff up.”

Well, not unlike the others, Zacchaeus was desperate to see Jesus. We don’t get a lot of information about Zacchaeus as Luke is the only gospel that mentions him but we know that he is a chief tax collector which means he had others under his charge. Jericho was a city on the way to Jerusalem and was a trade town, a rich town, a town that was heavily taxed. What these tax collectors would do was collect the percentage required by the Romans and then double or triple it and take the extra for themselves. This is what Zaccheus was known for and it is why he was the most despised man in the city. I wonder if he was lonely.

So when Jesus was in the city, it is no wonder that no one made room for Zacchaeus to get through. And to be able to see, whether he was short or not, he had to find a position where he was elevated. No one was letting him by so he ran on ahead and climbed a tree. A couple of things to note about this: 1) A Jewish man never ran because to do so meant he would have to pick up his tunic which would expose his legs. 2) If it was in poor taste to run, it was certainly in poor taste to climb a tree. So you have a man running past the crowd and climbing a tree. Awkward.

Jericho was also known as “the city of priests.” So if Jesus was going to stop by on his way to Jerusalem it would have made sense for him to visit with some priests. Maybe have a nice visit, one rabbi to another. Perhaps, but Jesus isn’t conventional. Jesus is awkward. As Jesus is passing by, he calls Zacchaeus by name. But then he says something interesting. He says, “Hurry and come down, for I must stay at your house today.” The Message translates this as “Hurry down. Today is my day to be a guest in your home.”

Now I don’t know about you, but I was raised that you never go anywhere uninvited. It is considered impolite to just “show up” on someone’s doorstep. Jesus just up and invites himself to this man’s house, and not just to any man, to the most hated man in town.

Could you just imagine this in your life? Please do not name any names, but picture the person that you despise? Maybe someone that irks you, rubs you the wrong way, annoy you, or you just don’t get along with them. Got it? Now imagine saying that you’re coming to their house. Or inviting them into yours. Would it be…awkward?

Here’s the thing: the community that Christ is building isn’t about social graces. It’s about sanctifying grace. We don’t become holy by chit-chatting about the weather over hot dogs. We become holy by taking the risk of deep community, by leaning into what is awkward and pushing through it, trusting that God has more in store.

When I was younger, I remember my mom inviting others to join us for lunch or dinner. Usually it was a friend or another family member. But then it would be that person at church who had raised her that didn’t have family. It would be the woman who had lost her husband, the cousin who was being taken advantage of, or the teenager that didn’t fit in. It would be the one who said they didn’t have any plans on Thanksgiving or Christmas. One day I remember a man who didn’t have a place to go showing up at church and the next thing I know he is sitting across the table from me at lunch.

Perhaps you know people like this who have that kind of spirit. Perhaps you have done the same. Or maybe you are like I was…like the people around Zacchaeus who just grumble “what are you doing going to his house? Don’t you know who he is, what he has done?” I didn’t mind some people coming over sure, but just anyone? I mean, I knew some of the people from church, but I didn’t really know them. Coming to our house? That’s in our personal space.

Oh but what if there’s more? Last Sunday afternoon I listened to the pastor at Corinth First, John Garrot say this: “If God is infinite, there’s always more.” Have you ever thought about it? If God is infinite, there’s always more. More grace, More love. More knowing God. More forgiveness. More reconciliation. More community.

Maybe God is more interested in building authentic community than maintaining our sense of comfort. Maybe the community of God is meant to invade our personal space with the wonder of miraculous, awkward grace. Grace that says “Today is the day I will be a guest at your house.” Grace that calls us to repent, grace that restores us to community, grace that shows us there is something on the other side of awkward.

For those of you who are about to begin a dinner club together and may not know everyone that well, it may be a bit awkward. At the start of the pandemic, I was meeting with a group on Wednesday nights and we had to go to Zoom like everyone else. Zoom is awkward on its own. But we decided to keep gathering each week. And after the study ended we kept gathering and instead of a study I would ask them things like “How is it with your soul this week? What is God up to in your life? What is giving you life right now? What is causing you to be anxious? What are you afraid of?

We had a LOT of awkward pauses, but I kept at it. Deep community doesn’t happen overnight. It is a muscle we flex by our interaction with the Holy Spirit. We have to be willing to reflect on our life in God and our life with one another. It’s not easy, but it is worth it. We kept at it and suddenly we were sharing real prayer concerns, real joy, real questions, real stuff. And they kept meeting. And now they are in their third year of meeting weekly. Because they found something on the other side of awkward.

On the other side of awkward, Zacchaeus came bolting down from the tree and in an act of repentance, agreed to pay back everything above and beyond that he had stolen. Four times as much. On the other side of awkward, salvation was brought to Zacchaeus’ whole family and he was declared a Son of Adam, a member of the family of God, forgiven and restored to community. On the other side of awkward with Jesus, sinners ate at the table, men and women were healed from sickness and sin, and freedom and salvation became household names. On the other side of awkward, the lose are found.

So don’t shy away when it is awkward. Instead lean in. Be patient. Plug in. Place yourself in the flow of God’s grace. Run ahead. Climb up. Because Jesus is is meant to be seen, salvation is meant to be shared, and community is meant to be restored.