Do You Appreciate The Godly Woman
Do You Appreciate The Godly Woman?
Diary of a Mad Black Woman is a story about Helen McCarty who is married to Charles, a successful attorney. After 18 years of marriage, they seem to have everything except happiness. When Charles admits to an affair, he throws Helen out of their home with nothing but her clothes. Helen turns to her mother, her grandmother, and eventually to God to help her pick up the pieces.
In this scene, Helen (Kimberly Elise) visits her mother (Cicely Tyson).
Helen admits, "I think I'm losin' my mind Momma. He hurt me so bad. He was my everything."
"God is your everything", says her mother. "Don't you know he's a jealous God? He don't want no man before him."
"I don't even know where to begin picking up the pieces of my life," Helen responds.
"Lord have mercy", says Momma. "I was 39-years-old when you were born. I never dreamed I'd have children. And then here you came—sweet bundle of joy. But what did I do? I think I shielded you way too much. Now you gotta get out there and try to stand on your own two feet."
"Oh no, Momma, I can't do that. I'm not strong like you."
"Sure you are," says Momma. "You got the strength God gave us women to survive. You just ain't tapped in to it yet."
After a pause Momma says, "Come here. Come on." Helen kneels and places her head in her mother's bosom and Momma continues. "Just let it go. There's nothing wrong with shedding a few tears. It cleanses the soul. You know, you need to stop thinking about what you think you lost and look forward to what there is to gain. It's a new life baby. It's right in front of you. All you've got to do is reach out and grab it."
"How do I do that momma? How?" Helen asks.
"By waking up every morning and thanking God that you did. And then ask him to help you. Just ask the Savior to help you."
Elapsed time: 00:43:30 to 00:46:00
Content: Rated PG-13 for profanity
Proverbs 31:10-31 An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. 11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain. 12 She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. 13 She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight. 14 She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar. 15 She rises also while it is still night And gives food to her household And portions to her maidens. 16 She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard. 17 She girds herself with strength And makes her arms strong. 18 She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp does not go out at night. 19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hands grasp the spindle. 20 She extends her hand to the poor, And she stretches out her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household, For all her household are clothed with scarlet. 22 She makes coverings for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies belts to the tradesmen. 25 Strength and dignity are her clothing, And she smiles at the future. 26 She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. 27 She looks well to the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children rise up and bless her; Her husband also, and he praises her, saying: 29 “Many daughters have done nobly, But you excel them all.” 30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. 31 Give her the product of her hands, And let her works praise her in the gates.[1]
1) What value do you put on excellent woman?
Proverbs 31:10 An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.
a) What does excellent mean?
· Definition of “Excellent”- Kittel’s Theological Word Book of the Old Testament says, “The individual designated seems to be the elite warrior similar to the hero of the Homeric epic…When the term is used of a woman (Ruth 3:11; Prov 12:4; and 31:10) it is translated “virtuous (ASV, rsv “worthy” or “good”), but it may well be that a woman of this caliber had all the attributes of her male counterpart.
Strongs Concordance says - 12 times, “riches” 11 times, “wealth” 10 times, “power” nine times, “substance” eight times, “might” six times, “strong” five times, and translated miscellaneously 33 times[2]
· Virtuous or Excellent is way different than elite warrior isn’t it? Virtuous has the meaning of good, righteous, and honorable, but definitely not heroic or mighty warrior. Excellent has the meaning of outstanding, brilliant, exceptional, or first rate. Why the difference? Is it possible that a woman can be a mighty warrior? Interpretive sexism? Why translate it one way for a man and another for a woman? The NIV translates it for a man, Mighty Warrior, the GNT as “brave soldier” and The Message as “tough soldier” but none translate as excellent or virtuous when it comes to the man.
b) Paper plate or china?
Prov. 31:1…For her worth is far above jewels
Solomon is setting up for us the characteristics and value of this hero-woman or wife and her value.
· We live in a disposable society, how do you treat your hero, like china or like a paper plate? If you had a Ferrari, would you go off roading with it?
· We lose value when things become common.
· We lose value when we don’t know what we have.
· We lose value when things get tarnished.
Solution:
· Imagine how life would be without your mate
· Are you in a rut, try something new this week that you and your spouse have never done before.
· Get away this week, just the two of you with no external interventions.
· Learn to forgive, make the decision to walk in it, give it time, and get the heart of God. You get the heart of God by prayer and the principal of “blessings.”
Luke 6:27-28 “But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.
2) What level of trust do you have with her?
Proverbs 31:11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain.
Ruth 3:11 “Now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you whatever you ask, for all my people in the city know that you are a woman of excellence.
a) How is trust established?-
· First, we make the decision to rely or place confidence on someone.
· We base our decision to trust on our instinct, our experiences, our hopes, and our intuition.
· In the case of the Prov 31 woman, her character is evident. It is easy to trust her.
b) How is trust broken?- Trust is broken when a confidence, a vow, an expectation, or perception that we have about another is not lived up to.
James 5:12 My brothers and sisters, above all, do not use an oath when you make a promise… When you mean yes, say only yes, and when you mean no, say only no so you will not be judged guilty.
c) How do you reestablish trust?
· If you deem the relationship redeemable, make the decision to forgive.
· Set up boundaries. Boundaries keep things safe. Boundaries take the subjective and makes it objective or measurable. Boundaries set up people to be a success.
· Make a deposit into the trust account.
3) Wives, do you do your husband good?
Proverbs 31:12 She does him good and not evil All the days of her life.
a) What does it mean to do him good and not evil?
Proverbs 12:4 (NASB95) An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones.
· What does “good” mean? This root refers to “good” or “goodness” in its broadest senses. Five general areas of meaning can be noted:
1) Practical, economic, or material good – In other words they aren’t out putting the husband into debt. They are adding to the prospering of the family.
2) Abstract goodness such as desirability, pleasantness, and beauty
3) Quality or expense
4) Moral goodness
5) Technical philosophical good. [3]
- What does “evil” mean? - In the moral and religious realm of meaning, the verb denotes activity that is contrary to God’s will.
b) The P.31 woman is consistent in what she does all the days of her life.
How do develop consistency?
- Count the cost before you commit
Luke 14:27-28 (NCV) Whoever is not willing to carry the cross and follow me cannot be my follower. 28 If you want to build a tower, you first sit down and decide how much it will cost, to see if you have enough money to finish the job.
- Stay the course and expect a harvest to your commitment.
Mat 19:29 Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, all those who have left houses, wives, brothers, parents, or children for the kingdom of God
Unemployed women in Germany who refuse to work in a brothel face the risk of losing their unemployment benefits. A U.K. news source, The Telegraph, reports:
Under Germany's welfare reforms, any woman under 55 who has been out of work for more than a year can be forced to take an available job—including in the sex industry—or lose her unemployment benefit. "There is now nothing in the law to stop women from being sent into the sex industry," said Merchthild Garweg, a lawyer from Hamburg who specializes in such cases. "The new regulations say that working in the sex industry is not immoral any more, and so jobs cannot be turned down without a risk to benefits."
Clare Chapman, "If You Don't Take a Job as a Prostitute, We Can Stop Your Benefits," The Telegraph Online, (1-30-05); submitt
4) God has an anointing for women to prosper them and their families.
Prov. 31:13 She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight. 14 She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar. 15 She rises also while it is still night And gives food to her household And portions to her maidens. 16 She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
In 1978, two women began their own business—Wetherill Associates, Inc—in an industry not typically associated with female entrepreneurs: automobile parts. Wetherill rebuilds and distributes replacement car parts.
The founders (Marie Bothe and Edith Gripton) had the idea to develop a business based on ethical practices; they wanted their company to be a living example of the maxim: "Right actions lead to right results. Wrong action leads to wrong results."
As part of their training, employees were taught to apply ethical standards to all matters of their job performance. For example, sales people were told never to pressure customers, never to discredit competitors, never to use negative sales tactics, and—most of all—under no conditions were they to lie.
So what are the chances a company led by two idealistic women can survive in the dog-eat-dog world of used car parts?
Most people who were asked that question in 1978 laughed condescendingly. But they're not laughing anymore. Almost three decades later, Wetherill Associates is still going strong. Sales are in the hundreds of millions; profits are in the tens of millions, and the company is debt-free.
You've probably been told before that you have to cut ethical corners in order to succeed in business. This kind of thinking has even worked its way into the ministry. In contrast, God's word reminds us of the real truth: You will reap what you sow.
Prospering principals:
a) Know your work
b) Work hard
c) Take joy in what you do
d) Take care in what you buy
e) Take care of others
f) Invest
g) Diversify your investments
Recap:
Do we value our women?
Do we trust our women?
God wants to anoint our women to prosper?
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[1] New American Standard Bible : 1995 update. 1995. The Lockman Foundation: LaHabra, CA
ASV American Standard Version of the Bible
[2]Strong, J. 1996. The exhaustive concordance of the Bible : Showing every word of the test of the common English version of the canonical books, and every occurence of each word in regular order. (electronic ed.) . Woodside Bible Fellowship.: Ontario
[3]Harris, R. L., Harris, R. L., Archer, G. L., & Waltke, B. K. 1999, c1980. Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament (electronic ed.) . Moody Press: Chicago