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Introduction
Ephesians chapters 5 and 6 and the importance of walking a Spirit-filled life.
This is all a result of what God has already done for you through Jesus Christ.
As a result of God’s blessings, we are called to live in distinction from the rest of the world.
In Chapter 5, Paul calls on us to walk in purity, putting away all crudeness and immorality (Eph 5:1-4) (this will become more significant today).
He goes on to tell us to be awake in Christ and alive in the Spirit, not giving into drunkenness, but to be people of a lifestyle of worship (Ephesians 5:18-19).
And last week we discussed the distinction of a Christian marriage that is based on mutual submission, with the husband and wife each having a unique, God-given role in the marriage and family (Ephesians 5:22-33).
Today we continue down this path with the discussion of the Distinction of the Christian Marriage.
I find it interesting that when the apostle Paul talks about being Spirit-filled, the first relationships that he develops is marriage and family, and then he tacks on the end how we get along with employers and employees.
The emphasis on Spirit- filled living is about marriage and the family.
There are three primary commands that Paul lays out for the family to follow: Children obey, Fathers bring your children up in the discipline of the Lord, and don’t provoke your children to anger (Ephesians 6:4).
It is just that simple and that direct biblical instruction.
Children have one duty, and that is to give to their parents obedience and honor.
Parents have one duty, and that is to give to their children discipline and instruction in the Lord.
However, the family is being absolutely devastated in America today.
There are breakdowns of the family unit at alarming levels coming in from all sides.
It is a satanic movement that seeks to dismember the family unit.
The family had always been under attack by Satan from the very beginning.
But it seems since the 1960’s the assault on the family in our Western culture in increasing in intensity.
The heart of this assault, I believe, is to keep families out of church and away from God’s grace.
A study once disclosed that if both Mom and Dad attend church regularly, 72% of their children remain faithful.
If only Dad, 55% remain faithful.
If only Mom, 15%.
If neither attended regularly, only 6% remain faithful.
The statistics speak for themselves - the example of parents and adults is more important than all the efforts of the church and Sunday school.
Junior sports have done more damage to families than most other constructs of society.
There are other things that are leading to the demise of the family.
The ’60s and the sexual revolution because people can pursue their physical satisfaction without being married, and society doesn’t look down on that anymore.
The women’s liberation movement, in which women have tried to take the upper hand and treat men poorly.
The homosexual revolution has undermined the holiness of the marital union.
We have produced a generation of selfish and self-centered people who’s only concern is their wants, rights, and desires.
The onslaught of pornography has perverted the minds of men and statistically, when a man is addicted to porn, children are more likely to become sexually promiscuous.
Then there is the fatherless epidemic because of all the sexual perversion we allow in our society.
Men who leave women alone after impregnating them.
Women who then wish to abort these children in the name of convenience, because they want the freedom to be sexually active outside of marriage without bearing the responsibility of the results of that behavior.
Forty-four percent of the population of adults in America are unmarried.
Only 50 percent of households have a married couple in them.
Fifty-six million American adults have always been single, and another 44 percent were married and are now single, by death or divorce.
Since the year 2000 - the most common household type in the U.S. is a person living alone.
Young adults emerging into the world are choosing to get married (if they get married) much later in life and many will cohabitate with their partner before they do get married.
As a result, nearly half of all children born in America do not have both a mother and a father raising them in the home.
Children are a blessing from God.
They are not commodities or inconveniences.
They are precious and made in the image of God.
But they are also not the center of the universe.
They are entrusted to you by God.
Your job as a parent to teach them to be holy, God loving people.
That’s your God-given mandate as a parent.
What has happened is that children have become the centerpiece of the family.
It used to be that the parents determined the family structure and values.
But now, the both parents are absent and working, so you have a child- centered home.
Kids are left to be raised by the schools, the media, or even other kids to learn values.
That’s contrary to how God designed the family and it’s impossible to pass down biblical values that way.
That’s the job of the parent and the child is to be obedient - submissive - to the parent.
The Greek word, “tekna”, means offspring.and
it references small children through young people, before they start their own adult life and Paul is referring to those that are old enough to understand the what it means to be obedient to a parent and the Lord.
Paul is echoing a foundational command from the 10 Commandments.
Now Jesus was fully human.
He emptied himself of his Divine limitations to come to earth, yet remained fully God without sin.
From here we see four categories in which children need to grow as Jesus also grew.
1.) Wisdom -mental capacity
2.) Stature - physical capacity;
3.) Favor with men - social capacity;
4.) Favor with God - that’s the spiritual capacity.
So, as parents are to come alongside their children to increase their mental capability, to increase their physical strength, to develop socially, and finally to develop spiritually.
This is the biblical mandate for parenting and children are to “obey their parents, as unto the Lord.”
That means that the obedience your child is to show you is under the authority as if it was from the Lord.
Then the Apostle Paul repeats the sixth commandment:
Now, Paul was specifically addressing children here, but I believe this is a timeless command.
Your relationship with your parents is different as you get older and become an adult, but your honor of them should never change.
That honor may be showing them forgiveness for pain that was caused in your life by your parents.
Here are some simple ways you can show honor for them:
Tell Them You Love Them
Show Appreciation.
Let your parents know that you understand what they do for you and your family.
Do a Chore for Your Parents.
Listen to Their Stories.
Ask your parents to tell you about what life was like when they were a teenager.
Ask Them for Their Opinion.
Speak Well of Your Parents.
Whether in public or private, make sure to keep your parents in high esteem
Be Aware of Your Reactions
Plan Time with Your Parents
Paul also says that this is a command with a promise of a long life.
An obedient child that honors their parents, will be a child that enjoys a rich, full, quality of life.
That is the promise of God.
That means that your life won’t be cut short by some divine discipline.
You’ll live a full life within the purpose of God.
How do you get your child to do that?
Discipline.
Do you see how this all comes together.
Christ is the head over all the family with Fathers as the head of the family submitting to the will of God and leading the family into the will of God.
Wives, submit to the husbands.
Husbands are to love their wives as much and in the same manner as Christ loves the Church.
Children are to submit to their parents and all of this give glory to God.
But there is one more aspect to this order:
The word fathers is in the English, but the Greek term pateres can also mean, parents in general.
But there was a Roman law called the Patria Potestas, which basically said, the father had absolute power over his children to the point of life and death.
A Roman father had so much power over his family that he could sell any family member as a slave.
Unwanted babies could be thrown outside to die.
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