Ephesians 6:1-3 Children

Ephesians 6:1–3

1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

Obey

The Greek word translated “obey” is a compound word made up of the prepositional prefix “under” and the verb “to listen, attend.” This word is also translated “to submit.” It describes the proper response in certain kinds of relationships, such as children to parents and servants to masters.

Colossians 3:20 “20 Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord.”

2 Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise),

Exodus 20:12 “12 “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you.”

3 so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.

Ephesians (Vers. 1–4)

III. HOW FAR WE ARE TO HONOUR AND OBEY OUR PARENTS (see Col. 3:20). We are to obey our parents in everything so far as their commands agree with those of God, and no further; if they required us to steal, or lie, or cheat, or do anything wrong, we should not be called to obey them. But, dear children, it is not probable that your beloved parents will ever require you to do anything of this kind; and in all other cases you are bound to obey them. I press that “ALL,” because many boys and girls will pick and choose amongst duties as they would amongst apples; they will do what is easy and pleasant to them. Now, it seems to me that difficult things are just the test of obedience. Some things are no test at all. Suppose a father were to say to his son, “Run and buy yourself a dozen raspberry tarts”; not one boy in a hundred but would run to the shop as fast as his legs could carry him; but for all that, he might be a disobedient boy at heart. Now, let us try him again; “Leave off your play, and take this note to the doctor’s for me.” Look at him now! He pretends not to hear, or he puts it on his younger brother, or he flies into a passion, or he says right out, “Father, I can’t.” But if, instead of this, he at once cried, “Father, I’ll be ready in a minute,” and pulled on his jacket, and went skipping down the street with a smiling face, I should mark him in my pocket-book for a thoroughly obedient lad.

4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

VS 1-3 are really hinged on this verse!

Though Paul does not say, “Set an example for your children,” in 6:1–4, this point is implied based on the previous chapters of Ephesians and by the focus on “teaching children.” What are children learning? They are learning basic Christian living by watching their parents.

Paul has been addressing all Christians in the church in Ephesus. Many of those Christians were parents. One of the primary places they were to live out these instructions in the previous chapters was in the home. Children are observing their parents’ own relationships to the Lord. They are watching them pray, study the Bible, and worship. They know if their parents are dazzled by God’s grace or not.

Children are observing how their parents value the church. They are watching how their parents are speaking truth lovingly, working honestly, giving generously, encouraging others properly, putting away bitterness and anger repentantly, and forgiving one another Christianly (4:25–32).

The first picture of God children receive is from their parents. They will get a sense of authority, love, and protection from their parents. As they see and treasure this example, it will inevitably point them away from the parents to the ultimate Father. Even when you fail to reflect God before your children, you should teach them how to repent and receive grace from God.

Your example is influential. What are they seeing? Are they learning to value mission more than money? Faithfulness to God over career success? Are they learning humility and repentance, or hypocrisy?

Tony Merida, Exalting Jesus in Ephesians (Nashville, TN: Holman Reference, 2014), Eph 6:1–4.