5th Commandment

Honor Your Father and Mother

Exodus 20:12 (NASB 2020)

“Honor your father and your mother, so that your days may be prolonged on the land which the Lord your God gives you.

Let Me Share a Story with You.

Reading-Honor Your Parents Fifth Commandment (Dr. David Feddes)

Once upon a time there was a little old man. His eyes blinked and his hands trembled; when he ate he clattered the silverware, missed his mouth with the spoon as often as not, and dribbled a bit of his food on the tablecloth. Now he lived with his married son, having nowhere else to live, and his son's wife was a modern young woman who knew that in-laws should not be tolerated in a woman's house.

"I can't have this," she said. "It interferes with a woman's right to happiness."

So she and her husband took the little old man gently but firmly by the arm and led him to the corner of the kitchen. There they set him on a stool and gave him his food, what there was of it, in an earthenware bowl. From then on he always ate in the corner, blinking at the table with wistful eyes.

One day his hand trembled more than usual, and the earthenware bowl fell and broke.

"If you are a pig," said the daughter-in-law, "you must eat out of a trough." So they made him a little wooden trough, and he got his meals in that.

These people had a four-year-old son of whom they were very fond. One suppertime, the young man noticed his boy playing intently with some bits of wood and asked what he was doing.

"I'm making a trough," he said, smiling up for approval, "to feed you and Mamma out of when I get big."

The man and his wife looked at each other for a while and didn't say anything.  Then they cried a little. Then they went to the corner and took the little old man by the arm and led him back to the table. They sat him on a comfortable chair and gave him his food on a plate, and from then on nobody ever scolded when he clattered or spilled or broke things.

That's one of Grimm's fairy tales, as retold by Joy Davidman. It's a not-very-subtle way of saying: honor your parents, or your children will dishonor you. That's much the same point as God makes in the fifth of the Ten Commandments. "Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you" (Exodus 20:12).

The fifth of the Ten Commandments is the only Commandment that promises a Blessing.

New American Standard Bible (Chapter 20)

that your days may be prolonged on the land which the LORD your God gives you.

This commandment prepares us to Honor God. God is our Father, he is our Creator. How can you say you Honor God and yet you do not Honor your parents? Remember this, we were all children at one time. We were all under the authority of our parents at one time. Just because you are grown and out on your own does not mean we do not honor our parents any longer.

Let’s look at this word “Honor”

noun

1. high respect; great esteem. "his portrait hangs in the place of honor" 2. adherence to what is right or to a conventional standard of conduct.

"I must as a matter of honor avoid any taint of dishonesty"

verb

3. regard with great respect. "they honor their parents in all they did" 4. fulfill (an obligation) or keep (an agreement).

"make sure the franchisees honor the terms of the contract"

The Hebrew word is:

Mounce’s Complete Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words (Honor)

Verb: כָּבֵד (kābēd), GK 3877 (S 3513), 114×. kābēd generally means “to honor.” It has the basic meaning of “weight.” “To honor” means to esteem highly (Isa 43:4) or consider someone or something as worthy of respect, reverence, and awe. Honor is improper if it exceeds that given to God (1 Sam. 2:29–30) or is directed to one’s self

While I am on improper Honor. Parents do not make your world revolve around your children or grand children. The first four commandments deal with our relationship with God, five through ten are our relationships with our neighbors.

In order of importance: God, comes first, then husband and wife, children are third in line. If you are giving more honor to your children than to God or your spouse. Stop, your priorities are out of whack.

My Professor Dr. Feddes states:

Reading-Honor Your Parents Fifth Commandment Reading: Honor Your Parents (Fifth Commandment, Dr. Feddes)

The relationship between children and parents has never been problem-free, but our society makes it even tougher because there is such a strong emphasis on the individual and far less on family bonds. In a cross-cultural survey, people in different countries were asked to complete the sentence, "I love my mother but ..." -how would you finish that sentence? In Western countries, most took this as a cue to offer some criticism of their mother. In South-East Asia, most people filled in the blank very differently. The answer was usually something along the line of "I love my mother but... I can never repay all that she has done for me."

As I mentioned above Commandments 5-10 deal with our relationships with our neighbors. But if we really look at the 5th Commandment that deals with a direct relationship within our family.

Jesus stated the following:

Matthew 22:37–39 NASB 2020

And He said to him, “ ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’

Respect for others and love for others begins at home!

My professor mentioned that our relationships with out children have never been trouble free. Children prior to their teen yours revere their parents , they think Mom’s and Dad’s can do anything and know everything. In the teen years, teenagers think Mom’s and Dad’s are outdated, that they do not know what it is like to be a teenager and in most cases, the teenager thinks they are smarter and know better than mom or dad and they let them know it. Now I know that there are some teens out there that have much more book smarts than than their parents, but teens if you are one of them how honoring is it to your parent to brag about how much smarter you are or how outdated your parents thinking may be?

Here is a quote by an anonymous author.

Notice to teenagers: If you are tired of being hassled by unreasonable parents, now is the time for action! Leave home and pay your own way while you still know everything.

Anonymous

Why is the Fifth Commandment Important?

The Fifth Commandment promises a blessing if we follow it. Well, what if that commandment is disobeyed? We are not promised a blessing that is for sure.

Most parents want the best for their children, they teach that they should follow the commands of God, they teach that they should follow societal rules (the laws of the nation, the rules at school, that there are certain ways that you act in public, etc.)

What would happen to a society if the children decided one day, not to honor their parents, they are not going to follow the rules of the house, the laws of the land, that everything is about what they want regardless of how it would affect others. Better yet, what would happen to a civil society if the parents just stopped being honorable?

Pick up a newspaper, turn on the news, look st social media. We are witnessing that today. The biggest breakdown of parents not being honorable, children not honoring their parents, children not being taught about God, the decline of the church in American Society and around the world,etc. All it takes is for one generation to disregard God, to disregard the rule of law and the nation is lost.

Parents it starts at home, be an honorable parent, an honorable, an honorable adult in society, in God’s Church.

Why is Honor your Father and Mother the 5th Commandment and not the 6th.

In my opinion it is because it prepares us for our relationship with God, it prepares us to be submissive to honorable authority, the ultimate authority, Our Father who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. By being submissive to honorable authority, it prepares us to be a servant to others, it prepares us to love our God with all of our heart, mind, body and soul and to love our neighbor as ourselves and it all begins in the home.

Proverbs 22:6 (NASB 2020)

Train up a child in the way he should go,

Even when he grows older he will not abandon it.

Ephesians 6:4 (NASB 2020)

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Do Not Commit Murder

Exodus 20:13 (NASB 2020)

“You shall not murder.