Sermon Tone Analysis
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People often view a marriage covenant as a contract.
This is a problem.
A contract is simply an agreement that is created to restrict movement.
It implicitly says, “These are the boundaries.
You will not break this agreement.
If you violate our terms, then I have the right to get out of this.”
In other words, I’m not stuck.
Contract is also a verb, one the Merriam-Webster dictionary defines as “to reduce by squeezing or forcing together.”
That doesn’t sound anything like what Jesus called the largeness of marriage.
Marriage is supposed to enlarge our lives, not make them smaller.
God doesn’t view marriage as a mere contract; He sees it as a spiritual covenant.
It’s an agreement that exclaims, “I am giving all of me to all of you.
Everything I am and everything I have is yours, and everything you have is now mine.
Everything we do will be multiplied, enlarged, and increased because of this beautiful exchange.
Paul encouraged husbands to love their wives just as Christ loves the Church.
This love is a covenant love that’s much more than a contract.
Husbands, aren’t you glad that Jesus loves you even when you aren’t very loveable?
Aren’t you glad that Jesus never views His relationship with you as just a contract, something He’s “stuck” in?
Our goal must be to imitate Jesus’ love in our responses and attitudes toward our brides.
(Paul doesn’t stop there, by the way.
He goes on to tell us to forfeit our lives for our wives.
What a command!)
Our marriages are meant to model Christ’s love for His Bride.
Why would those who don’t know Jesus want to be in relationship with Him if the relationships between His people are void of love, power, harmony, and commitment?
Are you seeing why your marriage is so important?
It’s not just about you.
It’s about God’s longing to reach the world with His love.
As we previously shared, true love for your spouse must be an overflow of receiving God’s love for you.
A love this profound cannot be fabricated.
It must be received from the One whose love defies human understanding.
Many of us have viewed the institution of marriage itself as the source of our problems.
Others have sought to blame their spouses.
Both perspectives expose a refusal to acknowledge and address the depravity of our own hearts.
We hope this is no longer the case for you.
Before you continue this journey, a decision must be made.
You must choose to believe that your marriage can and will become everything God has destined it to be.
“Covenant is a God thing.
The Bible clearly speaks of the blessings of walking in covenant, which include favor with God, blessed finances, security and trust, long life and health and godly character!
…In a true covenant environment we feel free to admit our failures and recurring challenges in life because we know we won’t be rejected for our honesty.
Then our spouse feels free to speak the truth in love to help us overcome our failures, while walking with us through the difficulties.
This is covenant living in Christ at its best.”
What is God speaking to you about covenant?
Ask yourself, Am I enjoying a covenant marriage?
What am I willing to do to experience it?
Pray and ask the Spirit for His input and strength.
God has a powerful purpose for your covenant marriage, reaching far beyond just you and your spouse.
He wants your union, like Abraham and Sarah’s, to send His love and truth far into the future.
Ask yourself, and the Lord, Who is my marriage impacting, and what effects is it leaving?
Ordinary Moments…Extraordinary Change
Extraordinary change is the result of what we do in the ordinary moments of marriage.
Ordinary Moments are . . .
Moments that happen over and over again.
Moments that you no longer expect to get better.
Moments when God seems far, far, away.
“God-less moments”
Three Main Ingredients
Allow God to Define our Love.
Our vision for love and marriage is often distorted by something good that takes the place of the whole.
We Can Know What Love Really Is
We Can Know What Love Really Is
Ingredient #2 … Love Expressed in the Details of Ordinary Moments.
Love Honors the Other.
Love must be sincere.
Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.
Love must be sincere.
Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.
Love Harmonizes
Basic Elements of Harmony o Express a Desire to Understand
Communicate Understanding
Basic Elements of Harmony o Express a Desire to Understand o Communicate Understanding
Share Your Emotions
Emotions are the currency of personal involvement.
Love is Given, not Earned
Do not repay anyone evil for evil.
Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.
18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
19Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.
20 On the contrary: ‘If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.’
21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Grace, simply defined, is unmerited favor, love when you deserve rejection.
Grace means I’m not giving just to get something in return.
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