Organizational Structure of the Christian Home
ORGANIZATIONAL STRUCTURE OF THE
CHRISTIAN HOME
Introduction: Christianity has been criticized by modern researchers in the area of marriage because of its position that the man is the head of the family. Most of these researchers are unbelievers and are looking for things to misunderstand. Unfortunately, many Christian men misunderstand this also, and that complicates the Biblical practice.
I. Equality of men and women must be established
A. Galatians 3:28
1. In the Jewish morning prayer, which Paul must have used all his pre-Christian life, the Jew thanks God that "Thou hast not made me a Gentile, a slave or a woman." Paul takes that prayer and reverses it. The old distinctions were gone; all were one in Christ. Barclay
2. After the events of vv 26–27, old divisions and inequalities have come to an end and new relationships have been established. WBC
3. anqrwpos - man, human being, person; pl. people; mankind, humanity. Most of the time in the Bible when it says “man” it means people, here the word is male
B. This is a general principle that must be considered in interpreting other verses
II. I Corinthians 11:3
A. kefalh - one who is of supreme or preeminent status, in view of authority to order or command - one who is the head of, one who is superior to, one who is supreme over; Christ is supreme over every man, the husband is supreme over his wife, and God is supreme over Christ
1 Cor 11.3.
B. This establishes God’s organizational structure in the church and family; it says nothing about superiority or inferiority
C. It might be better to translate “men” and “women” by “husband” and “wife”.
D. Women prayed and prophesied in the early church vs. 5
E. Children are to submit to parents Ephesians 6:1-3
III. Ephesians 5:21-32
A. Vs. 21 upotassw - (lit. to arrange under) pass. be subject, submit to, obey, be under the authority of; take a subordinate place
1. There is no verb in vs. 22; it is implied from this one
2. Until a husband learns how to submit to his wife, he will never be a fit husband
B. Vs. 22
1. This submission is voluntary
2. It does not imply inferiority
3. As to the Lord - 6:5-7
C. Vs. 23
1. Head implies responsibility; husband is responsible for the family
a. Behavior of children 6:4
b. Housework, cooking
c. Income
2. Responsible does not mean he has to do everything himself, but can delegate someone else to do it
3. As Christ is head of church; what did He do?
a. Died
b. Mark 10:44-45
D. Vs. 24 How is the church subject to Christ?
1. We have much liberty
2. We follow guidelines he left for us
3. When we pray, he hears us and gives us what is best
E. Vs. 25
1. Love - Treat respectfully; give what is best
2. paradidwmi - from a basic meaning: give over from one's hand to someone or something; of a self-sacrificial love: give up, yield up, risk (one's life)
3. If a wife knows her husband will give up any of his own needs for her, she will love him forever.
F. Vs. 26-27
1. Christ did for the church whatever it took to make her beautiful to him
2. So husbands should do whatever it takes to make his wife beautiful to him
G. Vs. 28-30
1. Remember the oneness
2. I believe wives can pray (lead prayer) in their families because of the oneness of the husband / wife
3. The wife’s body is his body; the husband’s body is her body
4. Everyone takes care of their own bodies
5. Would a man beat himself? Neither would he beat his wife!
6. ektrefw - of the body: nourish, feed (figuratively in EP 5.29)
7. qalpw - strictly impart warmth; hence cherish, comfort, tenderly care for H. Vs. 33
1. Husband love
2. Wife respect
IV. Colossians 3:18-19
A. Exact same verb is used: submit (also in I Peter 3:1)
B. Husbands treat your wives well
C. pikrainw - make bitter; pass. become bitter; be harsh or embittered pikrainw - literally: make bitter; figuratively and passive: become angry, become resentful, become bitter
1. Bitterness is long-term anger
2. Don’t do anything to her to make her angry. If you do, apologize and make it right.
V. Conclusions
A. Husbands, wives, children are all equal in God’s sight
B. God has established an authority structure in the home
C. Can the man make family decisions without consulting the family?
1. Would you call that treating them with respect?
2. Since the wife is an extension of his own body he should not change things for her with talking to her about it.
D. What happens when there is conflict? See chart by Susan Heitler
E. Who has the final say?
1. The husband
2. However, if he makes a poor / wrong decision, the responsibility is his. If he blames his wife or children, he is sinning.
3. His decision does not have to be what he wants to do. In fact, to always choose that way is selfish.
Conclusion: Yes, the husband is the head of the family. But he is not to be a dictator. And the wife is not his slave to wait on him.