Sermon Tone Analysis
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Tone of specific sentences
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“What is a father?”
A boy answered, “A father is a person who has pictures in his wallet where he used to have money.”
* *
*Scripture:*
Proverbs 20:3-7 (NASB95)
3 Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man,
But any fool will quarrel.
4 The sluggard does not plow after the autumn,
So he begs during the harvest and has nothing.
5 A plan in the heart of a man is like deep water,
But a man of understanding draws it out.
6 Many a man proclaims his own loyalty,
But who can find a trustworthy man?
7 A righteous man who walks in his integrity—
How blessed are his sons after him.
Scripture: Ephesians 6:4:
“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”
*Introduction:* God has given children someone whose power and prestige is greater than all the influences of society put together.
One person, more than any other, can make a difference in a young person’s life: his or her father.
The importance of a godly dad can’t be overstated.
But how do we become warm and attentive fathers?
How can we improve our parenting skills?
!
I. A Patient Man (v.
3).
*I. *A wise father must be patient.
Keil and Delitzsch translate this verse: “It is an honor for a man to remain far from strife; but every fool shows his teeth.”
Have you ever been around an irritable dog that growled and showed its teeth?
By the same token, have you ever been around an easily irritated dad who is always growling at his kids?
A good dad cultivates a pleasant, patient, positive personality.
None of us is totally unflappable, but it often helps to memorize Scripture.
When you feel yourself getting angry, instead of cursing or counting to ten, try saying one of these verses to yourself: Ephesians 6:4, Proverbs 15:1, Proverbs 29:11—or Proverbs 20:3.
Make up your mind to be patient, and learn to make a strategic exit whenever you find yourself losing control.
Ask God to help you control your temper, and learn to smile more at your children.
!
II.
A Hard Worker (v. 4).
A good father is also a hard-working man, not lazy nor a sluggard.
One of the causes of maladjusted, troubled children have been fathers that were too passive, and one of the characteristics of weak, passive fathers is laziness.
I’m talking about the man who drags home from work, flops in front of a television, pops open a beer, and stays there all night.
That man is setting a sad example for his children.
The world is lost, the work of the church is great, the days are short, the opportunities are big.
The Bible tells us to redeem the time, because the days are evil.
A good dad is a diligent man whose schedule includes time for his wife and children.
!
III.
A Good Listener (v. 5).
A good dad is also a good listener.
For our purposes today, we can paraphrase verse 5 to say: “The thoughts in a child’s heart are like deep waters, but an understanding father draws them out.”
A child’s heart is not a spigot, but a well.
Good conversation can’t be turned on and off at will, you’ve got to let it bubble up.
In other words, parents can’t just sit down with their children (especially their teens) and say, “Let’s talk.”
We’ve got to spend time together in a relaxed setting, giving our children lots of informal opportunities to open up.
!
IV.A Faithful Friend (v. 6).
A good dad is also a faithful friend.
A lot of men say, “I love my wife, and I love my children.”
But does he take time to be with them?
Does he meet their emotional needs?
Is he their companion?
Does he confide to them his thoughts and feelings?
Does he fulfill his role as spiritual leader of the household?
Is he really faithful before God?
!
V. A Righteous Soul (v. 7).
A good dad is a righteous man.
He leads a blameless life of high character and caliber.
He is committed to Jesus Christ, to His Word, to prayer, and to His church.
He is honest, modeling integrity for his children.
*Conclusion:* The promise at the end of verse 7 says that the children of such a man will be blessed.
Happy is the child whose father is a patient man, a hard worker, a good listener, a faithful friend, and a righteous soul.
Happy are the children of the dad whose God is the Lord.
*20:3* One who is a peacemaker is under the blessing of God (Matt.
5:9).
A needlessly contentious person is but a fool.
The man of peace has glory; the fool, only shame.
Better to avoid the quarrel altogether (17:14).
*20:4* Because the *lazy man *(19:24) does not plow his field on time, he has nothing to harvest (10:5).
*20:5* *draw it out:* The wise of ancient Israel knew something that modern counselors rediscover in their training and experience, that motivation for behavior is complex.
A gifted counselor is able to draw out from a person genuine feelings and motivations, just as someone draws water from a deep well.
*20:6* The idea here is self-worth as against true worth, an inflated self-opinion as against the true nature of things.
We each tend to present the best; but within we may know the worst.
*20:7* The freedom and pleasure of *integrity *are magnified in this sentence (19:8).
The idea is one of legacy.
The *righteous *not only live well themselves; they also leave a happy legacy to their *children.
*Conversely, the wicked (the foolish) leave a legacy of despair.
A family’s faith will engender family traits.
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20:3 An *honorable* person makes a point of keeping aloof from strife.
*A fool* isn’t happy unless he’s quarreling with someone.
20:4 Plowing time in Israel is in November and December, when the wind commonly blows from the North.
*The lazy man* uses the cold weather to excuse his inaction.
Without the plowing there can be no planting, and without the planting no harvest.
He’ll go out looking for grain in his fields and wonder why it isn’t there.
20:5 A man’s thoughts and intentions are often hidden deeply in his mind.
He will not generally bring them to the surface.
*But a* person of discernment knows how to *draw* them *out* by wise questions.
For example, a good counselor can help a person bring crooked thinking to the light and thus remedy it.
20:6 It is not hard to find those who /profess /to be loyal, but it is another thing to *find* those who really /are /*faithful*.
There is a difference between what men are, and what they want others to think they are.
It is the difference between “Person” and “Personality.”
20:7 *The righteous* *man walks in* honesty and *integrity*.
*His children* come into a noble heritage and benefit from his life and example.
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*20:3.*
Avoiding *strife* is honorable, though the way some people are *quick to quarrel* would make one think they thought /quarreling/ is honorable.
Such people are fools.
Arguments can be avoided by overlooking insults (12:16), by dropping issues that are potentially volatile (17:14), and by getting rid of mockers (22:10).
*20:4.*
In the Middle East the *season* for plowing and planting is the winter, the rainy season.
*A sluggard* avoids the discomfort and work of plowing a muddy field in the cold, *so at harvesttime he looks* for a crop from his field *but *he has *nothing.*
Without effort and advance planning there are few results; lack of work leads to lack of benefits.
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