Sermon Tone Analysis

6 Aspects of Gospel-Centered Forgiveness in Marriage

[HEAVILY BORROWED FROM FOLLOWING SOURCE]

January 16, 2018 by Paul Tautges

http://counselingoneanother.com/2018/01/16/10-aspects-of-gospel-centered-forgiveness/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+counselingoneanother%2Fmain+%28Counseling+One+Another%29

Marriage for many

American culture has s

I want to begin by asking,

When people get married,

what do they think of their spouse?

What keeps a marriage together?

what do they think of their spouse?

Many will answer -

How do newly weds typically think of marriage?

Love conquers all - they just need to be in love.

compatibility

Good upbringing

Good financial planning

Read every marriage book - so they are wise about marriage.

Is there anything else?

- When we consider that we are all sinners ()

- And Sin is not about knowledge - but flesh passion ()

When we consider this,

There is on

- we must remember we didn’t marry Jesus - no matter how wonderful our wife or husband is.

- We married a reforming sinner - who needed the son of God to break their slavery to sin.

When Two Sinners Say I do by Dave Harvey makes this point really well.

A great book if you have not read it yet.

Now let me make another point.

let me ask you something

What makes two people madly in love with each other on the wedding day

- quite their marriage and get a divorce?

Is it because of their

servant attitude’s

AND

sacrificial love

No,

it is because they allowed sin, anger, and bitterness to tear their marriage apart.

ILLUSTRATION:

Recently,

my daughter and wife went to a birthday party.

The birthday girls parents are divorced

one manned the party room

and one manned the activity.

Why could they not stand to be in the same room together?

Hurt, anger, bitterness.

Hurt, anger, and bitterness over being sinned against by our spouse breaks up marriages.

She is hurt because he sinned against her,

and he is hurt because she sinned against him.

And so Anger and Bitterness drive a wedge right through their love and their relationship.

It destroys peoples marriages.

As long as our marriages are based on

as long as I can trust you

and you won’t hurt me

Our marriages are doomed.

So what is going to get us off the marry go round.

It is like Emmerson Eggrichs calls it, - the crazy cycle.

Confessing and Forgiving one another.

James 5:16

Good marriages are built on Confession and forgiveness.

ILLUSTRATION:

I recently heard a song about marriages -

In it the song talked about how we hang up picture perfect pictures on the wall of our marriage,

But we don’t hang up pictures of our sin, our fights in marriage.

Marriages are always built on confession and forgiveness.

When you look up at the wa

records some of the most alarming words ever spoken by the Lord Jesus Christ.

In the portion of His teaching which has become known as the Lord’s Prayer, He instructed the disciples to regularly pray for forgiveness.

He then concluded His teaching with the warning: For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses ().

What was Jesus saying?

He was saying this: So serious is the refusal to forgive, by one who claims to be a Christian, that Jesus warns that such a character pattern may be evidence of false faith; that is, that the professing Christian is merely that—only one who professes Christ, but does not actually possess Him.

But the true believer, the sinner who has been made new in Christ, will be one who desires to make peace.

The fruit of the gospel’s work in a person’s heart includes the formation of a posture of forgiveness which flows from grace.

That is, the ongoing recognition of one’s own desperate need for salvation will produce a humility and tenderness of heart that stands ready to forgive those who sin against us—whether knowingly or unknowingly, intentionally or unintentionally.

Philemon was a letter written by Paul requesting a slave master to forgive a runaway slave.

The importance of this need to forgive and be restored to one another is so great that there may even be times in which the help of a third party is necessary.

This peacemaking ministry is also a fruit of the gospel’s work in the human heart.

As Jesus said, Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God ().

In the writing of the personal letter called the book of Philemon, it is that peacemaking role that the apostle Paul now assumes.

Paul’s appeal to Philemon to receive his runaway slave, who is now a brother in Christ, reveals ten admonitions connected to biblical forgiveness.

To be a believer who models genuine grace, you must…

In it, Paul describes 6 aspects that important for Christ-centered forgiveness in marriages.

In it, Paul describes 10 aspects that important for Christ-centered forgiveness.

Paul’s appeal to Philemon to receive his runaway slave, who is now a brother in Christ, reveals ten admonitions connected to biblical forgiveness.

To be a believer who models genuine grace, you must…

So lets look at Philemon for understanding forgiveness,

and it’s application in our marriages.

1) Forgiveness in marriage is an obligation of the gospel (vv.

8-9).

Philemon

Why should we forgive - because the Gospel demands.

– Paul possessed apostolic authority over believers and the churches.

Therefore, he could have commanded Philemon to receive Onesimus, but instead appealed to him.

He wanted Philemon to do so for love’s sake; that is, he desired forgiveness to flow from his brother’s heart as a proper response to the gospel.

Further

2) Forgiveness in marriage facilitates reconciliation (vv.

10-13).

Philemon 10-13

Reconciliation is a necessary component of forgiveness.

Why couldn’t those parents stay married together?

Because they never sought reconciliation that can be found in forgiveness.

– Again, rather than giving a command, Paul makes a request for his child, whose father I became.

Paul sent Onesimus back, even though he cared deeply for him, so that he would be restored.