The Joys of Marriage 2

The Joys of Marriage

Marriage should be a source of Joy yet, even when two committed Christians get married, it can be a struggle.

One of the reasons there is so much misery in marriage is that husbands and wives seek their own joy but they do not see the joy of the other.

The Biblical mandate is for the husband and wife to seek the joy of each other.

Ephesians 5:25 KJV 1900

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

Ephesians 5:25–28 KJV 1900

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

Christ love redeems and purify.

1. love our wives like Christ loves the church

2. Love your wives like they love themselves.

Christ love redeems and purify.

Adam’s love blames and condemns.

Adam’s love blames and condemns.

He protects himself at the expense of his wife. This either results in broken connections, of it was the result of a broken connection.

Good self love is one of the keys to happy marriage. A person who does not love themselves, is going to have difficulty loving you.

Genesis 3:12 KJV 1900

12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.

According to Divorce attorneys, the number one reason for divorces is a lack of connection.

Adama and Eve lost connectivity to each other, this resusted in the demise of their home.

How do you keep connected to your spouse.

Think about each other

Do things together. The dishes, dinner, play, date.

Say goodbye and good to see you with hugs and kisses.

Touch each other, hold hands, enjoy extended hugs (do it after worship and prayer)

Touch each other, hold hands, enjoy extended hugs (do it after worship and prayer)

Make love often.

When seeking a spouse, avoid people with poor self image, insecure, or unhappy.

Understand Marriage is a mystery

Ephesians 5:32 KJV 1900

32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

We are created in God’s image.

God is inherently plural. He is never lonely.

He declares man without woman as not good. .

In creating humanity, God was performing his own wedding ceremony. Righteous human beings were to be his bride.

Marriage is a mystery, because it represents the relationship between God and holy, people that is his church.

What God commands us to do, is what God does on behalf of his church.

He created us, that is he ask us to marry him.

When we fail, he redeems us, that is, he refuses to divorce us, but forgives us instead.

When he comes back to earth in the second coming, he is coming to get us, that is he has decided he cannot, and will not live without us.

We are his bride, his people and he loves us with abandonment, and we commands that husbands and wives should do the same for each other.

God wants us to have a shared vision with him as to his plan for us, he desires that we know him intimately so we can appreciate his love.

According to the divorce attorneys, Lack of a shared vision and the disappearance of intimacy, are two of the primary reasons people get divorce.

We are attracted to opposites, but in marriage, the differences drive us crazy.

He is a spender, you are a saver.

You want to take a walk, he wants to watch the ballgame.

He thinks its you job to cook, you disagree.

men need sexual receptivity to feel romantic,

Woman needs romance to be sexually receptive.

As long as both are getting what they need, they willing provide what is needed. But a bad day at work, an unfortunate life experience, throw one person off, and soon the whole relationship is off. To enjoy the joys of marriage, you must understand the mystery and keep the fires of love burning.

So how do you stay one, so you can experience the joys of marriage.

Recognize what God does for you, and do it for your spouse.

Forgive and forget when your spouse fails your expectations

Recognize marriage as a life long commitment.

Let your spouse know that whatever happens in the relationship, they she is yours, you are hers, and you cannot image life without her, so you will always come to get her.

Remember mutual submissiom.

Ephesians 5:21–24 KJV 1900

21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

when you cannot agree, wives submit to your husbands decision.

The third thing I want to look at is the mutuality of marriage. A young bride-to-be was at the rehearsal for her wedding.  She was nervous and having a hard time remembering what she was supposed to do when she walked down the aisle. The minister said, “Relax, it’s not hard. First, all you need to do is slowly walk down the aisle.  Second, walk straight at the altar.  Third, when get to the altar, turn and look at him—your husband to be.  If you’ll just remember those 3 things, you’ll do just fine.” The next day, everyone was seated at the church and it was time for her to walk down the aisle.  As the organist played the Wedding March, she walked down the aisle saying out loud, “Aisle. . .altar. . .him.  Aisle. . .altar. . .him.  I’ll alter him!” If i can be provocative - Thousands of brides have walked down the aisle saying the same thing—“I’ll alter him.” Instead of a determination to alter each other there should be a desire to see the other fulfil their mutual roles. Even when the passage begins by encouraging mutual submission the submission of Christ to the church and the church to Christ is different.

A young bride-to-be was at the rehearsal for her wedding.  She was nervous and having a hard time remembering what she was supposed to do when she walked down the aisle. The minister said, “Relax, it’s not hard. First, all you need to do is slowly walk down the aisle. 

Second, walk straight at the altar. 

Third, when get to the altar, turn and look at him—your husband to be.  If you’ll just remember those 3 things, you’ll do just fine.” The next day, everyone was seated at the church and it was time for her to walk down the aisle.  As the organist played the Wedding March, she walked down the aisle saying out loud, “Aisle. . .altar. . .him.  Aisle. . .altar. . .him.  I’ll alter him!”

Instead of a determination to alter each other there should be a desire to see the other fulfil their mutual roles.

is the one who serves.

The head provides, nourishment, guidance through the eyes, and protection through the ears.

Jesus says the one who rules,

is the one who serves.

Jesus submitted himself to his church and they nailed him to a cross, but that act was the salvation of his family and his marriage to us.

When a man loves a woman like that, and a woman loves a woman like that, they they will indeed become one flesh and experience the joys of marriage.