Untitled Sermon (10)

FAMILY DRIVEN FAITH:

INTRODUCTION NOTES:

“I believe that we are looking for answers in all the wrong places. Our children are not falling away because the church is doing a poor job-although that is undoubtedly a factor. Our children are falling away because we are asking the church to do what God designed the family to accomplish. Discipleship and multi-generational faithfulness begins and ends at home. At best, the church is to play a supporting role as it 'equips the saints for the work of ministry”’. (FDF/Baucham/p.7)

“...put the ball back in the family’s court and motivate, correct, encourage, and equip families to do what God commands concerning the next generation. The Bible is clear about what God expects out of the home and about how it is to be accomplished. Unfortunately, most Christians did not grow up in a home that taught these truths. Thus, we continue to repeat the “sins of the fathers.” (FDF/Baucham/p.7)

OBSERVATION: I find/observe very often that even when referencing a positive memory, experience or outcome of a youth ministry...the first justifying factor still comes back to the parents. (ie. when I was growing up, my parents....). There is a God mandated multigenerational impact from parents to children and then even to their children. There is on the other hand at best an experiential impact of church programs. For some this experience is positive while for others it is negative.

WORDS:

Discipleship

multi-generational (faithfulness)

Jurisdiction

CHAPTER 1 “LAY OF THE LAND”

Key Aspects of Church Family ()

Mature Christian (men/women)

Bible Study

Church attendance/fellowship

70-88 percent of Christian teens are leaving the church by their second year in college.

OBSERVATION: It should be obvious to us that such youth were never of us, because they literally were never of us. The vast majority of Christian youth leave for college before ever actually regularly sitting under the preaching of the word on a consistent basis. Most have been segregated and entertained through church.

“The majority of American teenagers appear to espouse rather inclusive, pluralistic, and individualistic views about religious truth, identity boundaries, and the need for religious congregation.’ In other words, the culture of secular humanism appears to have co-opted America’s Christian teens.” (FDF/Baucham/p.12)

“It is as though Christian parents in America have been lulled to sleep while the thief has come in to steal, kill, and destroy our children right under our noses. () I didn’t write this book as an expert with all of the answers. I am just a minister who has seen this alarming trend over the past decade and a father with a desire to see his family characterized by multigenerational faithfulness.” (FDF/Baucham/p.13)

TWO SIDES OF LIFE

...if I spend hours reading the Bible and praying and invest the lion’s share of my time ministering to others while neglecting my role as husband and father, my relationship with Christ is out of balance or, worse, inauthentic.” FDF/Baucham/p.13)

,

Requirements for a minister highlight the emphasis on the home...

First one must be able to teach. Second, he must manage his household well. (, and )

“...if I have not performed in an exemplary fashion as I strive to raise my children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, I have no business shepherding God’s flock. 'If a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?’” (FDF/Baucham/p.14)

ONE MANS JOURNEY

Three Commitments: (FDF/Baucham/p.16)

Committed to staying together and thriving as a couple.

Committed to investing in our children with a view toward multi-genrational faithfulness

Committed to doing whatever we can to reproduce the first two commitments in the lives of others.

A WIDE SCREEN FAMILY IN A FULL SCREEN WORLD

The question is not whether or not our children sin later in life. The question is, do we have a biblical obligation to train them before they leave home? Is there any biblical validity to the idea that Christian parents should allow their children to experiment with ungodliness?

Many families have been lulled into what I like to call a full-screen view of parenting. We look at the biblical mandate and compare it to societal norms, and there appears to be something missing.....all of a sudden our desires for our children change. Now all we want for our kids is what ‘every other parent’ wants for their children. The result is a generation about whom..... ‘religion seems to become rather compartmentalized and backgrounded in the lives and experiences of most U.S. teenagers.”.... (FDF/Bauchmam/p.18)

It seems there are a few things that we deem more important for our children than growing in grace. (FDF/Bauchman/p.21-22)

Making the Grade

“I want my children to get a good education”

Making the Team

“How do your kids learn teamwork and sportsmanship? How do your children learn to be competitive?”

Making Time

Proper relational investment and boundaries. Protect your child’s purity.

THE ANTI-MARRIAGE CULTURE

“The sin that I think besets this generation...is the sin of delaying marriage as a lifestyle option among those who intend some day to get married but they just haven’t yet.” - Albert Mohler (FDF/Bauchman/p.22)

THE ANTI-CHILD CULTURE

When did we begin to hate children?

“Christians must recognize that this rebellion against parenthood represents nothing less than an absolute revolt against God’s design.” - Albert Mohler (FDF/Bauchman/p.24)

NOTE: The testimony shared in this portion of the book by V. Bauchman about the closing of his wife womb must be read with sensitivity. First this is a testimony of a conviction that V. Baucham and his wife shared as they grew in the Lord. This is not shared in a condemning manner of anyone else. It is a personal testimony of how God moved in their hearts and minds to reshape their view and outlook of family life under God’s design. Second, this portion of the book is not discussing “family planning” but a proper view of children. The “full screen” sees “family planning” while the “wide screen”, the one that sees God’s design that has been cut off from the view of the “full screen” sees a child, a life, a blessing from God. The difference that we are discussing is not where the conversation ends, but where it begins. I personally do not even like the phrase “family planning”. It robs us from looking at the full picture. Yes their is a planning, but we all know that “family planning” as a norm in culture is discussing being the determiner and directer of the size and layout of your family. It is a thought process that if we are honest and consistent as Christians leads us down the path of being pro-murder of infants in the womb. It also sets us up for how we view children when they come out of the womb...that they are a burden, a headache or a status symbol...

THE ANTI-CHILD CULTURE

"Think about it- Moses sits down and examines the situation. Israel is on the threshold of a monumental occasion. They are about to possess “the Promided Land.” They had an opportunity forty years earlier but were unwilling to trust God to defeat the inhabitants of Canaan. Two lone voices, Joshua and Caleb, stood out in the crowd as Caleb said, ‘We should by all means go up and take possession of it, for we will surely overcome it’ (). However, the people sided with the naysayers and did not go forward....Now forty years later Israel once again stands on the verge of possessing the Promised Land, and Moses, the great leader that he was, decided to give them a few final instructions. Thus he stood before the people to give the law again. Thus the book bears the name Deuteronomy (Deutero= repeat; nomos= law, a restating of the Law. (FDF/Bauchman/p.28)

What would you say to a group of believers about to enter a land occupied by pagans?....Moses knew exactly what to say. He gave them God’s word. That word echoes through the halls of history and still resonates today. (FDF/Bauchman/p.28)

There are many worthwhile pursuits in this world, but few of them rise to the level of training our children to follow the Lord and keep His commandments. I desperately want my sons and daughters to walk with God, and I am willing to do whatever it takes, whatever the Bible says I must do in order to be used by God as a means to that end. My prayer for you is that God would awaken in you that same passion. Something tells me He already has. (FDF/Bauchman/p.29)

CHAPTER 2 “A GOD WITH NO RIVALS”

Hear, O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD is one!

Consider what the Bible says about God’s jealousy concerning His name and His glory:

You cannot read these verses and come away with a flippant attitude about God’s glory...God is God. He is not running for God, and He doesn’t need your vote (or mine)....

.....A family without a commitment to the God of the Bible has no hope of stemming the tide of cultural onslaught. If we mix a little biblical truth, a little secular psychology, a little romance novel ideology, and a little eastern mysticism, we will get a deadly mixture of lies. Unfortunately, this is exactly what many Christian families do. We do marriage according to Dr. Phil, raise our children according to Dr. Spock, govern our sex lives according to Dr. Ruth, and only run to Dr. Jesus when things have gotten so bad we can’t find another doctor to help us.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.32-33)

“We live in an age where many gods vie for our allegiance. What’s worse, these gods try to convince us that if we bow down and worship them, they will give our children what the God of the Bible cannot give-success by worldly standards.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.36)

“How can we avoid worshiping idols in a culture filled with them? How do we rise above the culture and walk with God?...We simply need to follow Paul’s admonition in .” (FDF/Bauchman/p.37)

“These words give us a pattern that will set our lives on a Godward trajectory...this passage is connected to Paul’s passionate statement about parents’ responsibility to teach their children in ....this text closely parallels Moses’ teaching in Deuteronomy....Paul quotes in his teaching. ...From this text we learn that we must watch our walk, be good stewards of our time, understand God’s will, constantly yield to God’s Spirit, and order our relationships by the Book. (FDF/Bauchman/p.38)

Note: the command in is not to walk by desire or good opinion, but it is to be careful to wallk so to understand what the will of the Lord is.

WATCH YOUR WALK: (vv.15-16)

much more is caught than taught. Do your children see you praying, studying the word, using inappropriate language, yelling at your spouse....

BE GOOD STEWARDS OF THE TIME (V.17)

“Once they (your children) are born the clock starts ticking, and there is nothing you can do to stop it or slow it down. Your only hope is to make the most of the time you have.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.39)

UNDERSTAND GOD’S WILL (V.17)

“Is it wrong to want good things for your children? Not necessarily. Unless in our effort to attain “the best for our children” we ignore their God-given gifts, talents, abilities, and passions....The key is to understand that our children don’t belong to us- they belong to God. Our goal as parents must not be limited by our own vision. I am a finite, sinful, selfish man. Why would I want to plan out my children’s future when I can entrust them to the infinite, omnipotent, immutable, sovereign Lord of the universe? I don’t want to tell God what to do with my children-I want Him to tell me!.....When I allow my will to take precedence over God’s will, I have not only given way to a rival- I have become on.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.42)

CONSTANTLY YIELD TO GOD’S SPIRIT (V.18)

Whether it is before eating, during difficult seasons, during special trips or times of joy, there are multiple times where we as parents can stop to recognize the presence of God through prayer and surrender to the guiding of His spirit and truth.

ORDER YOUR RELATIONSHIPS BY THE BOOK (V.21)

“Verse 21 says that we are to be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. Verse 21 is an umbrella under which the next twenty-one verses fall. The submission in verse 21 is demonstrated in three relationships: wife/husband, child/parent, and servant/master. In other words, obedience to verse 21 (which is connected to verse 18 and the command to be filled with the Spirit) requires not only that children submit to parents, but that wives submit to husbands. You show me a wife who is not in submission to her husband, and I’ll show you a household in disarray.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.48)

TAKE ACTION---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->

Make a list of potential idols in your life. Are there things in your life that require of you things that are only due to our God? If so, identify them. Ask your children to participate in the process.

Get your family together, and decide how you are going to crush the idols in your life. There may be things that you need to get out of your house. More than likely, there are also things you need to get off your schedule.

Have a special time of family prayer and repentance. Confess the sin of idolatry before God, receive His forgiveness, and celebrate the renewed freedom you now enjoy.

CHAPTER 3 “Learn To Love”

You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.

"If you want to be a godly head of a family, you must ensure that there is Christian harmony among those under you, appropriate for a house where the leader fears God. - John Bunyan”

LOVE IS LOVE:

“Perhaps you have heard it said that “Agape is God’s kind of love” While it is true that phileo literally means “brotherly love,” whereas agape refers to a selfless, sacrificial love, it is not true that agape is God’s love and phileo is man’s love...there are several instances where phileo is attributed to God.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.50) (, , , , )

“Both the Greek and Hebrew language are at times more precise than common English. Whereas you or I would say to a friend, a spouse, or a child, “I love you,” these languages would afford us the option of using different words to communicate the same idea in different contexts. In other words, phileo is not a cheap or watered-down form of agape; it is merely an alternative that carries different nuances. In other words, love is love.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.51)

LOVE GOD: LOVE YOUR BROTHER:

“If we learn to love God, we will inevitably learn to love, period.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.51)

“Our homes must be rife with the aroma of love. Those who visit us should notice immediately that they have left the world of self-serving, egocentric narcissism and have entered a safe harbor where people value and esteem others above themselves. Outsiders should enter our homes and never want to leave....we can learn to love. The first step is to rid ourselves of the ineffective methods and ideologies that have led us down the current path.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.51-52)

THE DILEMMA

MYTH #1 “love is a random force”

MYTH #2 “love is an overwhelming force

MYTH #3 “Love is an uncontrollable force

MYTH #4 “Love is a sensual force

THE END RESULT: Love doesn’t translate

MOSES AND THE BIBLICAL PORTRAIT OF LOVE

“One of the best-known verses in the Bible is . The Shema (‘to hear’) is a daily prayer uttered by devout Jews. The name Shema is derived from the first Hebrew word in this passage: “Hear O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD is one!” However, the most popular part of the passage comes next: “YOu shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might” (v.5). The three HEbrew words used here (translated heart, soul, and might) provide a clear biblical definition of love: Love is an act of the will accompanied by emotion that leads to an action on behalf of its object.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.57)

LOVE IS AN ACT OF THE WILL

“The Hebrew word for heart is lebab...it is very important. The word means ‘inner man, mind, or will,’ Remember, the heart is a muscle that pumps blood, so this has to be a figurative reference. Here we see that the word points to our will. Hence biblical love is an act of the will’ it is a choice...I can no more love without my mind than I could speak without my tongue.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.57-58)

LOVE IS ACCOMPANIED BY EMOTION

“Love is not void of emotion...while emotion is a large part of the love equation, it must not be the sum total. Although love is accompanied by emotion, biblical love is not led by emotion. Emotions change.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.58-59)

LOVE LEADS TO ACTION ON BEHALF OF ITS OBJECT

“The last term, meod, if translated literally, means muchness or force. The word implies effort or action....Throughtout Deuteronomy Moses connects loving God with keeping His commandments (6:5-6; 7:9; 10:12; 11:1, 13,22; 13:3-4; 19:9; 30:6, 16,20)....the theme is love and obey. This theme is repeated not only throughout the OT but also in the New.”(FDF/Bauchman/p.59)

; ;

“if you want to know whether or not someone truly loves God, watch what he or she does. If a person does not do the things that God says are pleasing and acceptable, and in fact does the things that God abhors and forbids, and yet claims to love God, it will be tough to support that claim...if my actions are self-centered, I am demonstrating love for me...love leads to action on behalf of its object” (FDF/Bauchman/p.60-61)

ADVANTAGES OF THE BIBLICAL MODEL OF LOVE (FDF/Bauchman/p.63-64)

The Biblical model of love is VOLITIONAL

The Biblical model of love is TRANSFERABLE

The Biblical model of love is SECURE

The Biblical model of love is SATISFIES

PEOPLE ARE WATCHING

“God has provided a love that will satisfy our deepest longings. We don’t have to wait around for the violins and cellos...All we have to do is embrace the biblical definition of love and begin to walk in it. First, we learn to love God. Next, we begin to express that same love toward others. finally, that love begins to be reflected back to us. And the next thing you know, people start to ask....” (FDF/Bauchman/p.67)

TAKE ACTION---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->

Go back over the last few knock-down-drag-out arguments you and your spouse have had. Did you contemplate throwing in the towel? If you did, consider the truths discussed in this chapter, and ask yourself what it would cost for you to do that.

Consider your relationship from your children’s perspective. Do they know that you and your spouse love each other? As they watch you and listen to you do they see a picture of biblical love, or do they see a picture of a fickle, unstable, insecure relationship that could fall apart at any time? If it is the latter, you may want to go to your children and apologize for the picture you’ve painted and start to present another portrait.

If you are considering marriage, have you built your relationship upon the expectations of the Greco-Roman myth or the biblical mandate? What will you do to promote the latter and not the former in your marriage?

CHAPTER 4 “Learn To Love”

"These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart.”

“....biblical love is the foundation upon which a child’s spiritual life is built....that foundation is only the first step. If biblical love is the foundation, a biblical worldview is the frame. It is imperative that we prepare children to think biblically. A child without a biblical worldview is like a ballplayer without a playbook. He may have spectacular abilities that will allow him to make the occasional jaw-dropping play, but more often than not he will end up in the wrong place at the wrong time, and worse, not knowing how he goth there or how to get back.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.69)

“...salvation is like a coaching change. We go from one regime (the world, the flesh, and the devil) to another (Christ). ...Unfortunately, many Christians are either oblivious to the larger implications of these truths or never take the time to incorporate them into their everyday walk...

....We must change not only our allegiance but also our language and thinking....this is what Moses means when he says, “these words....shall be on your heart.’ This is not just a call to do what God says; this is a call to submit our very will to the will of God....the Hebrew word for heart in this passage is used to indicate volition and will. This is a call to a complete worldview overhaul.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.70)

“The commandments, which provide the framework within which the Israelites could express their love of God, were to be upon you heart- that is, the people were to think on them and meditate about them, so that obedience would not be a matter of formal legalism, but a response based upon understanding.” - Peter Craigie (FDF/Bauchman/p.71)

“He would have it implanted in their hearts, lest forgetfulness of it should ever steal over them; and by the word “heart” He designates the memory and other faculties of the mind; as though He had said that this was so great a treasure, that there was good cause why they should hide it in their hearts, or so fix this doctrine deeply in their minds that it should never escape.” John Calvin (FDF/Bauchman/p.71)

If following the Lord means changing our worldview, we must acquire a basic understanding of what a worldview entails.

If our worldview must change, the biblical worldview is not our default position. In other words, if biblical worldview thinking were normal for us, there would be no need to adapt our worldview when we come to faith. Thus it is essential that we learn what a worldview is in general and the biblical worldview in particular.

(FDF/Bauchman/p.71)

....people do not get a biblical worldview simply by regularly attending church....

“A biblical worldview must be both taught and caught- that is, it has to be explained and modeled. Clearly, there are huge segments of the Christian body that are missing the benefit of such a comprehensive and consistent expression of biblical truth.” George Barna (FDF/Bauchman/p.71)

WHAT IS A WORLDVIEW:

OUR GLASSES:

“grid through which [one] sees the world.” -Francis Schaffer (FDF/Bauchman/p.72)

OUR ASSUMPTIONS:

“Our ground-floor assumptions- ones that are so basic that none more basic can be conceived- compose our worldview.” James Sire (FDF/Bauchman/p.73)

“Most peoples worldview is not based on critical analysis but on assumption. We don’t spend our formative years evaluating the merits of cultural assumptions. We simply see the way things are and fall in line.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.73)

OUR BIG PICTURE:

“The sum total of our beliefs about the world, the big picture that directs our daily decisions and actions.” Chuck Colson and Nancy Pearcey (FDF/Bauchman/p.73)

The key.... “Our worldview ‘directs our daily decisions and actions”...You and I act upon what we believe.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.74)

***my worldview changed in 2004 after the car accident. The struggle was realizing it without realizing it while everyone else wondered what was going on.

“Our children will ultimately act on what they believe too. If we do not give our children a biblical worldview, they will simply follow our rules while they are under our watchful eye, but as soon as they gain independence, they will begin to make decisions based upon their worldview. How many times have we seen this....A young man or woman who was raised in a ‘good Christian home’ goes off to college and loses his cotton-pickin’ mind! What happened? It’s actually quite simple; the restraints were removed, and his world-view took over.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.74)

***This is not a ‘removing the restraints issue’ but a worldview training issue.

“Your worldview is the set of instructions by which you determine the proper place for every thought, action, behavior, opinion, and decision in your life.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.74)

***Because mom and dad did it and i turned out fine is not a proper worldview in the Christian life though it is a popular one amongst those raised in the church and in youth groups. It is time to graduate into adult hood christian living. Such living does not do because of another but brings all things captive under the mind of Christ.

WHY OUR KIDS NEED A BIBLICAL WORLDVIEW

“The college where I teach...I regularly encounter pastors, Sunday school directors, youth ministers, and church leaders (most of whom are in their late thirties) who simply do not think biblically. What’s worse, many of them are initially skeptical of and resistant to the biblical worldview.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.75)

“We do not believe that teenage inarticulacy about religious matters reflects any general teen incapacity to think and speak well. Many of the youth we interviewed were quite conversant when it came to many other views on salient issues in their lives about which they had been educated and practiced discussing, such as the dangers of drug abuse and STDs/ Rather, our impression as interviewers was that many teenagers could not articulate matters of faith because they have not been effectively educated in and provided opportunities to practice talking about their faith.” Christian Smith (FDF/Bauchman/p.76)

“...George Barna found that less than 10 percent of self-proclaimed “born-again Christians” in America have a biblical worldview. What’s worse, he found that only half (51 percent) of America’s pastors have a biblical worldview. (FDF/Bauchman/p.76)

BASIC ELEMENTS OF A WORLDVIEW:

...5 most basic elements of a world view...

our view of...

God

man

truth

knowledge

Ethics

Reference chart (FDF/Bauchman/p.77)

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE ABOUT GOD?

“...Christian Theism believes in a personal God who created, rules, and interacts with the world.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.78)

The God of the Bible is

personal

sovereign

holy

the creator of the world

see (FDF/Bauchman/p.78) for further explanation

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE ABOUT MAN?

“What is the nature of man?....Christian Theism sees man as a special creation of God...created in the image of God ()...As God’s image-bearer man has inherent dignity and value...In Adam, man fell into sin (, , )...Apart from the redemptive work of Christ, man remains in his sin. (, , Coloss. 1:13-15, ) (FDF/Bauchman/p.79-80)

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE ABOUT TRUTH?

Christian Theism sees truth as objective and absolute. (FDF/Bauchman/p.81)

“That which corresponds to reality, identifies things as they actually are, can never fail, diminish, change, or be extinguished, must be able to be expressed in propositional statements, and is sourced in the God of the Bible who is the Author of all truth.” - Paul Shockley (FDF/Bauchman/p.81)

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE ABOUT KNOWLEDGE?

How do we know what we know?...Christian Theism,...holds that God created the world and everything in it; therefore, our pursuit of knowledge must balance reason and revelation....

....we come to know truth through God’s revelation in creation...

(; , )

...We come to know truth through God’s revelation in His Word...

() (FDF/Bauchman/p.82-83)

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE ABOUT ETHICS?

Christian Theism,..,views ethics as timeless and absolute. God determines what is right and wrong...God’s Word gives us clear instruction on ethics...(, )...ethics trancend time and culture. (FDF/Bauchman/p.84-85)

WATCH OUT FOR LEGALISM:

“It is very important that we live by biblical standards. However, it is equally important that we continually examine those standards to ensure that we don’t fall preay to legalism. And if we have convictions that are not necessarily scriptural, we should admit it. We must be able to say, “This is a personal conviction to which I hold myself, not a standard to which God holds us all.” (FDF/Bauchman/p.87)

TAKE ACTION---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->

Make a copy of the chart in this chapter, and add a blank column. Gather your children together, and ask them their views on the five key worldview categories. Fill in the empty column, and compare it to the other two columns.

Discuss the differences between Christian Theism and Secular Humanism and how your family’s answers line up with each.

Discuss the logical conclusions of each worldview as it relates to contemporary issues.