Sermon Tone Analysis
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When you’re a romantic at heart, you may view marriage like this:
“Once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl, and her laughter was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering.”
– Nicole Krauss, The History of Love
When you’re a little bit cynical, you may view it like this:
“People are weird.
When we find someone with weirdness that is compatible with ours, we team up and call it love.”
– Dr. Seuss
When you’re humorous: you may view it like this:
“I love being married.
It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”
– Rita Rudner
Marriage is interesting to say the least.
It’s an experience that brings out the best and worst in people.
We learn more about who we are when we enter into the marriage relationship.
People who want to be married, who are currently married, or used to be married can all agree that marriage is something that is challenging but very important in our modern society.
The scriptures go to great lengths to teach us on marriage.
Especially .
The way that Christians view marriage is unique to the rest of the world.
The ins and outs of Christian marriage point us to the gospel of Jesus Christ if we choose to look at it that way.
Paul wrote with a true intentionality to the church of Ephesus.
He writes about honoring our parents and raising our children in chapter 6.
Chapter 5 points to the clear motive that God has for married people and unmarried people.
This message is for everyone!
1. Define the roles in your marriage.
(v.
22-23)
Ephesians 5:
Contrary to modern belief, there is no religion that promotes equality more than Christianity.
In most religions, women are given a much lower place than men.
The verses we just read actually promote equality for relationship between a husband and wife.
“Subject” - owing obedience or allegiance to the power or dominion of another.
One who lives in the territory of, enjoys the protection of, and owes allegiance to a sovereign power or state.
The purpose of the marriage is to live in equality and submissiveness.
These are basic principles of live.
A Godly wife lives in submission to her Godly husband, who is the head of family.
Looking to Jesus, who is the head of the church.
There is no difference in importance, but for there to be unity, there must be leadership.
The seats in a fire truck:
- The driver
- The officer, next to the driver to speak on the radio.
He is assigned to insuring the safety of everyone in the fire truck.
- The back two seats go to the attack crew or the 1st line.
- There is another seat assigned for who is responsible for getting out to perform tasks associated with the forward or backward lay of the hose.
* Everyone has a role and they know their role.
To insure the proper way a fire crises is averted, they are trained to do their job.
Marriages cannot function without a husband and wife who know their roles.
All marriages are different for various reasons based on upbringing, personalities, and other things.
They don’t all look exactly the same.
Biblically, the model is for the husband to lead the household and for the wife to submit to her husband on the grounds of duty.
We are not called to compare our husbands to Jesus as Savior of the world but to submit to him as the head.
Defining the roles:
Determine the authority of your marriage.
Assign tasks that cover one another’s weaknesses and strengths.
Don’t allow baggage from your past to define your marriage and its roles.
Allow God’s word to define your decisions.
Don’t be afraid regroup and redefine these roles.
Your marriage is worth coming up with a plan for.
You don’t have to do everything by the seat of your pants.
Talk about your hopes and dreams for each other and what you want accomplish in your marriage.
Know the role that you have been defined in your marriage.
2. Fulfill the Responsibilities in Your Marriage.
(v.
24-28)
There is nothing a coach can do for a team who don’t play what they practice.
While Paul wrote that a marriage is to be associated with proper roles between a man and a women, the difficult part is taking on the responsibility that comes with these roles.
A husband and wife are to see their relationship as following the pattern of Jesus Christ and the church.
A true spiritual relationship of love and dependence.
, authority and obedience, Christ and His church.
How does Jesus feel about His church?
He knits us with Him, enables people to grow, nourishes her by caring for each member, gives her strength to be built up in love.
Wife
Isaiah
A wife may live out her duty to society, but the responsibility of her marriage and her family must be her first concern.
The wife must wholeheartedly accept her place in the marriage relationship as the helper to her husband.
This doesn’t mean that you stay home, cook meals, and never work outside of the home.
You are free to live your life and carry out your interests and passions in Christ, but you have a responsibility to love and support your husband.
Not because he is telling you so.
The word tells wives to be subject to their husbands in authority as the church is to Jesus.
The husbands commitment to his wife is no less demanding, but different and complimentary.
Husband
Husbands are called to love their wives.
Agape - A love that is totally unselfish.
Not only a practical concern for the welfare of the other, but a continued readiness to subordinate ones own pleasure and advantage for the benefit of the other.
“Washing” - Allowing to word of God to cleanse and sanctify our wives.
It was a Jewish custom that a bride take a ceremonial bath before marriage.
The groom would say, “Behold, thou art sanctified to me.”
The husband is not to view his wife as lower than himself, but a part of himself.
An extension.
To love her as he loves himself.
Christ sees the church in all her weaknesses and failures, and yet loves her as His body, and seeks her true sanctification.
Song of Soloman 4:7
There is a daily responsibility in a marriage relationship to live in devotion towards one another.
Greek words for Love:
Eros - romantic love
Philia - brotherly love that unites all believers
Storge - family love
Agape - God’s love for humankind.
Each form of love must be lived and played out in marriage but the love (agape) that Jesus has for the church is the love that will carry people through any storm that arises.
There is a love that endures.
A love that carries.
Why do 1 out of every 2 marriages end in divorce?
At some point, we forget what agape means and one or both of us stop fulfilling the responsibility to love in this way.
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