Sermon Tone Analysis

“But I resent what they did to me!” someone says.

According to Webster, our English word “resent” means literally, “to feel again.”

Your resentment is doing nothing more than replaying the memory of the wrong over and over again.

Each time you do, it is as though the wrong happens all over again.

No wonder you turn bitter!

Resentment magnifies the pain!

Introduction

Story about forgiveness

 

I want to speak to you about forgiveness.

Perhaps, as we imagine what this man’s life would have been like had he spent it in vengeful bitterness, we can see in a very practical way the value of forgiveness.

My experience has shown that forgiveness is often misunderstood, however.

Even Christians misunderstand it.

Because of the misunderstandings, some people find it impossible to live happy and productive lives.

In the time we have remaining, I want to ask and answer three questions: *(I) What is forgiveness  (II) Why must we forgive?, and (III) How can we forgive?*

 

*I.

What is Forgiveness?*

Some people think that forgiveness is the same as forgetting.

“Just forgive and forget,” they say.

But how do you forget, especially when the wrong is something that really hurt you or a loved one?

How could someone like Chris Carrier just forget what happened?

You can’t just turn off your mind.

What is God asking for, anyway?

The concept is simple in theory.

The Greek word for forgives means “to release or dismiss.”

When you forgive someone you release them from fault or blame.

They’re free.

They’re release.

Sounds simple.

But it isn’t.

A.

Forgiveness can be one of the hardest things God ever calls upon you to do.

You see, our innate sense of justice pulls against forgiveness.

We think, “They wronged me.

Let them pay!” Isn’t that justice?

Shouldn’t a person be made to pay for his wrongs?

Shouldn’t there be restitution?

But forgiveness denies us that right.

Forgiveness says, “You don’t have to pay - at least you don’t have to pay me.

You’re free.

The blame is dismissed.”

That isn’t easy to say! Forgiveness is hard!

B.

Forgiveness is also costly.

If I have a brand new car with 20 miles on it and park it in the church parking lot and you carelessly come driving in and smash into the side of it, doing $8000 damage, you and I are going to have a problem with our relationship!

Let’s suppose that just such a thing happens and you are unemployed and don’t have any insurance.

Let’s say you come to me contritely and say, “Dave, I realize that in my carelessness, I have wronged you terribly.

Will you forgive me?”

If I say “Yes,” who pays for the damages?

I do!

You go free!

You see, forgiveness is never a receipt given for a debt paid in full.

If you come to my house and, in a lighthearted moment, break a priceless family heirloom that cannot be replaced, and I say, “I forgive you,” who bears the loss?

I do!

That is why forgiveness is hard.

It’s costly!

“So,” someone asks, “does that mean that I should forgive someone even if they never acknowledge their wrong or say they are sorry?”

The Bible’s answer to that is “No.”

Forgiveness is granted when there is an aknowledgment of wrong and a resulting repentance.

(If my saying that raises some questions in your mind, listen up.

I’ll clarify with Scripture.)

Luke 17:3-4 says, “Be on your guard!

If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.

And if he sins against you seven times a day, and returns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ forgive him.”

Notice the condition of forgiveness in that verse: “If he repents, forgive him...” Jesus said on the cross, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

But if you look carefully at Acts 2:22, we see that Peter, under inspiration of the Holy Spirit, indicates they are still guilty of crucifying Jesus.

They weren’t forgiven until they repented and were baptized later on that day of Pentecost.

Those who didn’t repent weren’t forgiven.

The loving father of Luke 15 forgave his son and reinstated him into the family, but it was only after he said, “I have sinned against heaven and in your sight.”

He didn’t pronounce forgiveness and restore his family position while the boy was living with the pigs.

King David was forgiven after his adultery with Bathsheba, but only after he said to Nathan, “I have sinned.”

A Christian grants forgiveness when there is repentance on the part of the wrongdoer.

“So, does that mean I can go ahead a hate and be bitter toward someone who has wronged me until he repents?”

No. Paul said, “Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God.”

When Paul warned Timothy about a particularly dangerous metalworker in 2 Tim 4:14, He said, “Alexander the coppersmith did me much harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds.”

When someone refuses to repent of a wrong they have done, we must turn the matter over to the proper authority - in this case, God.

And what are we to do, then?

Jesus said in Matthew 5:44, “Love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you.”

In Luke 6:28, He said, “bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you...” A Christian’s responsibility when someone wrongs him or her and will not repent is to turn over the supposed “right” of vengeance to God, and in it’s place pray for the person and give a blessing instead of a curse.

In essence, he holds the door open in the hope the person will see the error of his way and repent.

At this point, someone may be inclined to say, “That’s too much!

I can’t do it!

But God doesn’t say you should.

He says you must forgive.

But He hasn’t left us without help, because

 

C.

Forgiveness is shown in Jesus Christ.

Listen, if you think that your sense of justice in wanting to see wrongdoers punished is strong, realize that God’s sense of justice is even stronger!

By all “rights” none of us should ever get away with all of our rebelliousness, our selfishness, our negligence, in short, our sin.

Justice demands that payment be made in full!

Someone must pay for what we have done wrong toward God and the payment price is our life!

So who paid?

Did we? No! Who paid?

God paid for it Himself!

When forgiveness is granted to someone who has done wrong, who bears the hurt of the wrong?

The one who does the forgiving.

That, my friend, is the story of the cross!

A lot of people think that God used an innocent third party (Jesus) and punished Him for our sins.

But that is not forgiveness!

Morally and justly the sins of one cannot be transferred to a third party.

It must be settled between the two involved!