Sermon Tone Analysis

October 7, 2007                                                                                                       SD 20

Dealing with Conflict.doc

File: E

*8*The Joyful Christian Part Nine

Dealing with Conflict

Philippians 4:1-5

 

If we are going to live a joyful life we must learn how to deal with conflict…

      Have any arguments lately?

A spouse?

A boss?

A co-worker?

A friend?

Experiencing any conflict at all in your life?

Hardly any life will progress far without experiencing some kind of conflict…

      Wills at odds with each other

            Desires and expectations colliding…

 

Try to plan a vacation for a family of five and see how many conflicting ideas you might come up with…

      Your are trying to do something fun, exciting, enjoyable...and it ends up in a major conflict…Sometimes you think it might be safer in Iraq…

 

Kinda like Lucy, in the Peanuts comic strip, -- Lucy says to Snoopy, “There are times when you really bug me, but I must admit there are also times when I feel like giving you a big hug.”

Snoopy replies, “That’s the way I am…huggable and buggable.”

And so it is in our relationships even in the church…

 

Conflict!

It even happens in the body of Christ!!!!

      Why?

Because we are filled with imperfect people…look around you…don’t you see that everyone else but you is just imperfect…not what they ought to be???

      Sure…and what about you???

There was a seed of unrest growing in the church at Philippi…

     Nurtured by self-will, and watered by opinions held with pride.

Paul gives some instruction to some specific individuals who are at the root of this disturbance…instructions that may well help us!

Some guiding principles!

*8**1.

conflict is inevitable.*

It is impossible that offenses will not come…”

 

There will always be opportunity for you to pick up an offense and carry it…the offense become a grudge…the grudge become a burden…the burden become a sin…and sin begins to separate you from the Lord and the joy he wants for your life…

* *

*8**2.

Selfishness is optional*  

Remember Timothy?  (2:20-21)

      He truly cared more for others than himself

 

The devil loves to take advantage of every misunderstanding that arises…but we are not ignorant of his devises…and here are two people who need to be reminded…

 

Euodia and Syntyche…I call them Odious and Soon-touchy!

They were good women who worked with Paul; they were sincere Christians -- who had some sort of contention between them that was affecting the church and Paul says --- Paul pleads,  Urges!

 

“I urge you…” (v.2)  “I implore”

NIV  “I plead with you…I plead with you.”

TLB  “Please, please, with the Lord’s help, quarrel no more—be friends again.”

(Phillips) “Euodias and Syntyche, I beg you by name to make up your differences as Christians should!”

This was such a serious matter and it was affecting the whole church because these women with godly reputations were spoiling the their testimony by their current attitudes toward each other—It was so serious that Paul is not afraid to name names…

 

We don’t know what their problem was but when James writes his letter he identifies the source of quarrels and conflict:

James 4:1-3 (NCV) \\ 1 Do you know where your fights and arguments come from?

They come from the *selfish desires that war within you*.

*8*Here are two principles to help us walk in harmony:

Some principles to restore joy and laughter in our relationships—especially in the church…

 

*8*1.

The underlying principle:  *“Stand firm in the lord”  4:1*

Now many of us are willing to stand firm in our opinions

           

But we are hard pressed to see clearly the difference between biblical truth (that must never be compromised) and personal opinion which we can hold and still be kind-hearted toward  others who hold differing opinions---goodness my wife and I don’t agree on everything and we love each other dearly--

 

Stand firm in the Lord---this is one of Paul’s favorite lines!

1 Cor 16:13  “Stand firm in the faith…”

Gal 5:1  “keep standing firm

1 Thes.

3:8  “Now we really live, if you stand firm in the Lord.”

2 Thess.

2:15  “So then, brothers, stand firm.”

Ephesians 6     “having done all to stand, stand therefore…”

 

Friends we must take our stand in the Lord!

In the truth of His word and the life of His character…

It is one of the most foundational principles to maintaining harmony and defusing conflict…Let the Lord be the center of our focus!

What would standing firm include?

(Chuck Swindol suggests the following)

*8*Following the teaching of Jesus.

*8*Respecting His Word

*8*Modeling His priorities

*8*Loving His people

*8*Seeking to carry out His will

 

When we do these things we won’t have much difficulty relating to other members of the body of Christ—even the ones who do not hold such priorities…

 

Question:  Do you stand firm in the Lord?

Or do you value your own opinions above the sacredness of Christ and His mission to win the lost?

“By this shall all men know that you are my disciples said Jesus, “that you love one another.”

Oh, how good and pleasant it is when brothers and sisters dwell together in unity.”

Declares the Psalmist…

Anything less creates havoc and disharmony and sadness!

     

1 Corinthians 1:10 (NKJV) (written to a church with unity problems)

10 Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and /that/ there be no divisions among you, but /that/ you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.

There is power in unity—

      Benjamin Franklin at the signing of the declaration of independence is supposed to have said, “brethren, if we do not hang together we will certainly hang individually…”

 

*8**2.

Second principle:   v.2

“Live in harmony in the Lord…”*

* *

Again we see that the focus of a true harmonious relationship with anyone is going to be when The Lord is the focus!

When it becomes about Him and not about me…

 

Stand firm and live in harmony!

Don’t compromise truth but put other people before your self and your biases and prejudices and opinions…

    You can love people in spite of their offenses or offensive ways

 

The common ground that must break down conflict is when Jesus Christ is Lord…

      Paul had already given these believers some specific instruction—Philippians 2:3-4 (NKJV) \\ /3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.

4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others./

Then he gave Jesus as the example---Jesus thought you were more important than his place in heaven—so he left it!

So you might have it!

He thought you were more valuable than the blood that flowed in His veins—so he drained it…that you might live!

He thought that you were more important than the sin that separated you from Him…so He took your sin on Himself—carried your blame, and your shame…just to restore a relationship that had been broken…

 

Someone always has to take the first step toward reconciliation

      God took that first steep in His relationship with you!

You had to take the next step…

 

In human relationships someone must go first---

      Paul begs his sisters in the Lord to make it right between them, because the cause of Christ was suffering as a result.