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THE BEDROOM: BATTLEGROUND OR PLAYGROUND?
The Secrets of a Satisfying Marriage - Part 10 of 12
Genesis 2:22 & 25
Bobby Earls, First Baptist Church of Icard, 11/29/98
A Sermon Series developed by Rick Warren.
Genesis 2. Whenever I look at this passage, I'm always reminded of the story of the pastor who was going to speak on this passage.
He had one of these loose leaf Bibles.
He stood to speak, came over to the podium and the page that he was going to preach on fell on the ground and he was unaware of it.
He stood and started reading the scripture, "And Adam said to Eve... " and he flipped a page and it was obviously out of order.
"`And Adam said to Eve...' very interesting, it looks like a leaf is missing."
We're going to talk about the subject of sex this morning.
Genesis 2:22 & 25 (Living Bible) "Then God made a woman and brought her to man.
`This is it!'
Adam exclaimed.
The man and his wife were both naked but neither was embarrassed or ashamed."
Don't you love Adam's reaction the first time he sees a woman?
Beautiful garden atmosphere, no clothes, "This is it!"
Literally "Bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh."
The KJV say, “Now.”
I always kid couples I am counseling for marriage when we look at this passage.
I tell them Adam said “Wow!” The best Hebrew translation of the phrase is "Hey, Hey!"
The fact it says, "...neither was embarrassed or ashamed."
We forget that it was God who invented sex, not Hugh Heffner.
It was God's idea, He created it.
We should not be ashamed to talk about what God was not ashamed to create.
Why did God make sex?
1) For unity
2) For pleasure
3) For children
1.
For Unity.
It's a bond between a husband and a wife.
Five times in the Bible it says, "They were of one flesh... you will become one flesh."
It's a communication tool when words don't work.
It is a physical expression of a spiritual and emotional reality.
The two become one.
The first purpose of sex is not to produce children, it is to produce unity between the husband and the wife.
2. For Pleasure.
God says, I created it for your enjoyment, mutual enjoyment of both the husband and the wife.
It's a gift.
3.
For Children.
"Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth."
That's the only command man has been able to keep.
The sad thing for most couples, the only purpose of sex in their marriage is this third one.
They have kids to show for it.
But there is no unity, no harmony, no pleasure.
Instead there is anger, frustration, hurt, misunderstanding.
What do you do?
The Bible says there are three keys to enjoyment.
And the Bible is a little more reliable than Dr. Ruth.
1.
The right attitude
2. The right atmosphere
3. The right adjustments
1. THE RIGHT ATTITUDE
More problems are caused by the wrong attitudes regarding sexual relationships than anything else.
Your attitudes determines your action.
Unfortunately, it is very easy to pick up wrong attitudes about sex.
You pick them up on the school yard, in the media, from your parents, bad experiences, trauma.
But these wrong attitudes affect your actions.
How do you get the right attitudes?
By accepting what God says about it.
And God has said a lot about it.
I Timothy 4:4 "For everything God created is good and nothing is to be rejected, but all is to be received with a prayer of thanks."
That includes your sexuality.
God made you a sexual being.
It's part of who you are, part of your identity.
Accept it without guilt or shame.
Sexual relationships, in marriage, are not a sin.
Not even a necessary evil.
God says it's good, it's planned, it's a part of life.
Love making between a husband and a wife is an honorable activity.
Hebrews 13:4 "Marriage is honorable and the marriage bed undefiled".
The Greek word for “bed” here is “coitus” which is sexual intercourse.
What the Bible is saying here is that it's not dirty, not bad, not evil, not even a necessary evil.
It's a good thing.
One woman said "Before I got married, I was taught all my life, whenever it comes to sex, it's `No, no, no'.
Then I went through a thirty minute ceremony, was given a piece of paper and all of a sudden it's `Yes, yes, yes'.
I'm having a hard time making the mental switch."
The fact is, as parents, we should not be teaching our children, "No, no."
We should be teaching them "Wait, wait."
The right time.
The Bible says that God wants you, if you're married, to enjoy your mate.
Proverbs 5:18-19 "Be happy, yes, rejoice in your wife.
Let her tender embrace satisfy you.
Let her love alone fill you with delight."
The Bible is very explicit about sex.
And the Bible says you're to enjoy each other.
Circle "delight".
That is one of the strongest words in Hebrew.
Other translations of this word: "be consumed, captivated, intoxicated, be ravished, be transported by her love."
Knox translation, "Let her steal away your senses."
He's talking about one bunch of fun! Be exhilarated!
It is God's will that your sexual relationship in marriage is a mutual, satisfying and exhilarating relationship.
The Bible teaches that sex, when properly used in marriage, glorifies God.
I Corinthians 6:20 "Use every part of your body to glorify God." Circle "every part".
What is the context here?
Paul is talking about sex.
He says you can use every part of your body to glorify God.
When God made you, He didn't make some parts of your body good and
some parts of your body bad -- some parts to be ashamed of and some to be OK about.
It's all good.
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